Lisa notes

Compassion for an enemy?

By LisaNotes December 1, 2014 Compassion 30 Comments

twelfth-step-compassion

This last lesson is the hardest.

I’m not sure I even need it.

Until a message pops up on my phone. My friend tells me she’s having a tough day, feeling excluded from family. I hear the pain in her words. The family believes this personal boycott is what the Bible tells them to do. It makes me terribly sad.

And angry. Maybe I do need this twelfth step of compassion:
Love Your Enemies.

Because despite my first thought (“I have no capital E Enemies!”), I wonder if I have small e enemies.

  • People who get on my nerves
  • People who cause pain to those I love
  • People I judge the harshest

Are they my enemies?

And what about the systems underneath them? Are they enemies? Even the religious ones? Maybe especially the religious ones? They can make me the angriest.

  • Religions that invert God’s good news into bad news
  • Religions that assume they’re always right
  • Religions that undervalue the grace of Jesus

The part of me that fails to love even them is the ugliest part of me. 

I text back to my friend. I sympathize with her. I say I’m sure the family does care about you; they just don’t know how to handle the differences, how to love despite them, through them.

But I don’t know how to either. How does one properly love their enemies? I still struggle with wanting to want to.

And I’d still rather not classify them as enemies. Is that okay? I’m uncomfortable with the word. And the concept. It’s too strong.

So I fall back on grace (again) for myself. I worship the One who is ever compassionate on me. Who loves me perfectly despite myself. Who is teaching me to love others, despite their faults, through him.

Love all others, he says. No matter what I call them.
Love those who disagree with me, who repulse me, who don’t love me back. Maybe especially those.

After twelve months of intentional focus this year on how to be compassionate, this I know: I remain a beginner.

I’m still in Compassion 101.

But I promise I’ll keep on learning as long as God will keep on teaching. Compassion is my lifelong lesson.

* * *

I saw someone wearing this shirt yesterday in church. It’s going on my Christmas list.

Love-thy-neighbor-t-shirt

Who do you want to love more? Did you have “one word” for 2014? Picked out one for 2015 yet? Please share in the comments.

compassion-one-word-2014

See all Twelve Steps to a Compassionate Life here, from Karen Armstrong’s book

twelve-steps-to-compassionate-life

On the blog – November 2014

By LisaNotes November 30, 2014 Archives No Comments

Books I’m reading in November ’14

By LisaNotes November 25, 2014 Books I Recommend 23 Comments

BOOKS I FINISHED FROM OCTOBER’S LIST

1. Vanishing Grace
What Ever Happened to the Good News?
by Philip Yancey

Vanishing-Grace-Philip-Yancey

My review here

Loved this one! I was blessed to also hear Philip Yancey speak about Vanishing Grace this month in Opelika, Alabama. He shares about 3 kinds of Christians that outsiders still listen to with respect: pilgrims, activists, and artists.

2. Les Misérables
by Victor Hugo

Les-Miserables-book

My review here

Finally!!! It took me almost 5 months to finish this, but I’m thankful I did. Hugo got mired down often in what seemed to me to be irrelevant details, but the story itself was beautiful indeed. And it was so much more than the films I’d seen (which were also phenomenal). I’m treating myself to a rewatching of the 2012 film today since this is my birthday!

3. Nickel and Dimed
On (Not) Getting By in America
by Barbara Ehrenreich

Nickel_and_Dimed

I recommend this one, too. It’s eye-opening about how people live (or not) on minimum wage jobs in America. (I listened to the audio book—it was nicely read.)

4. Praying in the Reign
by Bruce Green

Praying-in-the-Reign_Bruce-Green

My review here

My former youth minister Bruce wrote this book on the Lord’s Prayer. He takes you deeper into this model prayer, phrase by phrase. I thoroughly enjoyed listening to this voice from my past and applying it again to my present.

 

BOOKS I’M READING NOW

1. Mudhouse Sabbath
An Invitation to a Life of Spiritual Discipline
by Lauren Winner

Mudhouse-Sabbath_Lauren-Winner

I’m on the 9th of 11 Jewish spiritual practices that are also beneficial to the Christian community. Some you’d expect (prayer, fasting); others you might not (aging, candle-lighting). It’s good!

2. Jesus Feminist
An Invitation to Revisit the Bible’s View of Women
by Sarah Bessey

Jesus-Feminist_Sarah-Bessey

My review here

Don’t let the word feminist turn you away from this one. It’s an important word for today. And it’s not just for women to hear. “Women aren’t simply or only blessed by giving birth to greatness; no, we are all blessed when we hear the Word of God—Jesus—and put it into practice. We don’t rely on secondhand blessings in Jesus.”

3. A Christian Survival Guide
A Lifeline to Faith and Growth
by Ed Cyzewski

A-Christian Survival-Guide_Ed-Cyzewski

My review here

I’ll read most anything that Ed writes because I know it’ll be insightful, well-told, and will make me think. He’s already proving that to be true in this book that I’ve just begun. “In fact, I would go so far as saying that it is unbiblical to say that there is a ‘biblical’ way to live.”

4. The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up
The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing
by Marie Kondo

Life-Changing-Magic-of-Tidying-Up_Marie-Kondo

My review here

My closets are getting out of control (again) so I’m reviewing this book for a kick in the pants to tidy them up again. Instead of deciding what to get rid of, the author wants you to consider what to keep.

* * *

What’s a good book you are reading this month? Please share here.

Whats-on-Your-Nightstand-at-_5-minut

My books on Goodreads
Previous reading lists

A sacred rhythm of grace

By LisaNotes November 19, 2014 Grace, My stories, Worship 7 Comments

Antigua-Guatemala-September-2014

Around 7:30 each morning we’d leave the house in Antigua, Guatemala. We’d meet and pray with new people in new places over new situations all day. Laugh, cry, ponder.

Around 5:30 we’d return for dinner at Luis’s house. His wife Mirella would feed our bodies with authentic and incredible Guatemalan food.

And then, sweet bliss, Jesus would feed our souls.

Thank God. Because by nightfall, if I had had a magic eject button to pop home, I might have hit it. My body was tired, my soul was drained.

But in his wisdom, God didn’t leave me that opening.

He let me get in over my head; I had to depend on no one but him.

That is grace.

In that nightly worship, the Lord’s refilling came strong and undeniable. Through songs sung, scriptures discussed, prayers uttered—he wrapped his arms around us and poured in more Spirit than we had poured out.

And we drank. And drank. His presence was thick.

Until both body and soul were satiated for another night’s rest.

It is a holy rhythm, this filling up and pouring out and refilling once again. The rhythm is different for each of us. Different in time, in place, in style.

I loved the rhythm of God in Guatemala. It was simple, predictable.

But the rhythm of God here is just as sacred. His pulse, his movement, his Spirit breathes in and out. Whether there. Whether here. In fullness, with intentionality, by design.

Stay in the flow.
Therein lies grace.

During the day Jesus would teach in the temple courtyard. But at night he would go to the Mount of Olives (as it was called) and spend the night there.
Luke 21:37 (GW)

* * *

What does your flow look like? Is it different in different places, different seasons? Please share.

Related:

Are you prejudiced?

By LisaNotes November 17, 2014 Book reviews, Compassion, My stories 24 Comments

John-Piper_Bloodlines

Are you racist?

Don’t automatically answer, “No!”

Maybe you’re not prejudiced towards blacks or whites.

But maybe you are toward Baptists or gays or “white trash.” Or men over 60 or loud women or intolerant Republicans.

Our bus arrives late in the early morning hours in Antigua, Guatemala. We wanted to get to the Guatemala City airport with extra time to ensure no one would miss our connecting flights in Houston. But now we are hurrying.

I’m keeping up with the front of the crowd. The language barrier has only been minimal.

All is well. Until I begin filling out my travel form and a short older man walks up beside me. He mumbles something about “help” in an accent I barely understand. Is he offering it or needing it?

He’s needing it. Sigh.

He says he can’t read the form. Will I help? I glance at my watch. Double sigh. I say okay, thinking he’ll have only one or two questions.

But no. He hands me the entire form, a pen, and his passport. It’s in a language I can’t read. He’s not from around here, and by here, I mean not any of the Americas.

One question at a time, I ask him for answers. He often doesn’t understand the words (or maybe it’s my southern accent?). Place of residence? He’s vague. Are you carrying tools/equipment? He doesn’t understand. Do you have any samples with you? He really doesn’t understand.

Where are you going? Home. It’s a region our country doesn’t even officially recognize. An enemy nation of our friends.

And here I am helping him get there, with all my suspicions and irritations now high. Is this even legal for me to fill out his form? And now my fingerprints will be on it?

Do I still have prejudices? Um, yes.

In John Piper’s Bloodlines: Race, Cross, and the Christian, he tells of four ways his church seeks to eradicate racism through ethnic diversity. These can be useful to all of us.

  1. Pray
    If you want to be less prejudiced, pray for opportunities to meet real people that you might be prejudiced against.
  2. Prepare
    Read books. Listen to speakers. Explore outside your comfort zone.
  3. Probe
    Look for people different than you. Delve into friends’ circles that are wider than yours.
  4. Prefer
    Intentionally invite others into your life that are foreign to you. Proactively nurture relationships you never had considered. Initiate conversations that might be uncomfortable but can prove expansive.

Otherwise, if we remain blind to our prejudices, we’ll continue contributing to them.

“The sin of pride will subtly contaminate all our relationships, even where it is not recognized. A disease does not have to be diagnosed in order to infect and kill.”

Bloodlines is a helpful book to open our eyes to undiagnosed racism. The chapter on interracial marriage (which can be applied to many areas!) is possibly the best one.

“Will it be harder to be married to another race, and will it be harder for the kids? Maybe. Maybe not. But since when is that the way a Christian thinks? Life is hard. And the more you love, the more painful it gets. . . .

Christians are people who move toward need and truth and justice, not toward comfort and security. Life is hard. But God is good. And Christ is strong to help.”

Back at the airport, I finally finish the man’s form. I hand it and his passport back to him. He thanks me genuinely. “You’re welcome” then I dash off for immediate boarding (I didn’t miss the flight, thank God).

But I keep thinking about him.

Perhaps he isn’t a terrorist at all, but only a granddad anxious to see his wife and his family. To get home. Maybe I’ll erase the stereotype I’d drawn on him.

Because he is a real person. With a face. A name. A life.
Not an issue, not a political problem, not my enemy.

We’re more alike than different, me and this man. Two travelers on a journey whose paths crossed at a moment of need. Lord, have mercy on us both.

* * *

See the other. Be kind to the other. Love the other. It’s what God does. And what he wants us to do.

Who is an other in your life that you need to meet? To love? I’d love to hear in the comments.

My thanks to Crossway for the review copy of Bloodline