I’m splitting up my five groups of five favorite things this month, sharing one per day.
Today we look at 5 of my favorite memes from the month.
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I’m changing it up this month. Every month I share my list of favorite 5’s.
And I still am. But for October, instead of 5 groups of 5 things in 1 day, I’m spreading it out: 1 group of 5 things over 5 days this week.
It seemed a little less overwhelming to me. 🙂 TBD what I’ll do in November.
What are you enjoying this month?
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Sisters, You Have Permission to Lead an Ordinary Life
Breathe easy. Instead of thinking you have to do world-changing things, relax and live your quiet, ordinary life. It’s extraordinary enough as it is. (HT to Barbara)
Stop! Think Twice Before Switching Churches in 2020
I admit that temporarily changing churches has crossed my mind during this pandemic…but only because there aren’t many mask-wearers at my church so I haven’t been back in person yet. I miss Sunday gatherings.
Confession: I’m often guilty of stereotyping “old white men” as most resistant to seeing their own faults and being willing to change. But this article reminds me there are still quite a few “old white men” that I know personally who are incredible human beings.
How To Organize Your Digital Information
How easily can you locate a document or folder on your computer? I try to stay digitally organized, but it’s a battle. Some good tips here.
Embrace the Rule of Awkward Silence
“Intelligent minds like Tim Cook and Jeff Bezos embrace the rule of awkward silence. You should too. In a word of instant gratification, awkward silence is more useful than ever.”
What have you accomplished during the past 6 months of the pandemic? Have you compared your life now to your life a year ago?
Prior to the pandemic, I had built a tidy schedule of activities that felt meaningful and were enjoyable.
But the past few months? Many of those opportunities have been canceled. I feel I’m doing very little out there in the “real world.”
Often we lose our purpose when our activities change. And many of our opportunities have changed drastically in 2020.
But what if we’re measuring our purpose with the wrong yardstick?
Instead of judging ourselves as underachievers this year, what if we reevaluated what we’re trying to achieve anyway?
Beth Bullington’s story is a wakeup call. She’s the mother of a daughter with special needs. But she doesn’t want our pity because of it.
And she doesn’t want us to be sad for her daughter, assuming her daughter can’t do amazing things because of her disabilities.
Instead, Beth reminds us of this:
“Remember what God really wants. Loving God is the amazing thing that each of us can do.”
Beth’s daughter finds enjoyment in her life. Everything is her favorite. She “appreciates things, expresses joy, and tells people that. That is reflecting God.”
Yes!
The most amazing thing any of us can do is to enjoy God.
Look for God’s goodness today. Discover God’s grace. Delight in God’s presence. This is loving God.
And loving God is its own reward.
That doesn’t mean life will be easy. Or that we’ll always feel happy. But enjoying God will give us more contentment, even in the hard times.
Godly contentment reminds us that:
And who knows? Maybe one day we’ll even change our definition of “hard” things.
I’ve been counting 2020 as a hard year. Maybe years from now, I’ll look back on it as a year God shifted my thinking into a healthier direction. A direction of less comparison. Of more contentment. Of more enjoyment of him.
That would be amazing.
Read all of Beth’s post here at her blog, AsHeLeadsIsJoy.com:
“Don’t Pity Me Because I Am a Special Needs Mom“
What amazing thing can you do? Share your own blog posts at the linkup below.
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MAREE DEE – Embracing the Unexpected
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
HEATHER HART & VALERIE RIESE – Candidly Christian
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LAUREN SPARKS
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LISA BURGESS – Lisa notes
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Have you felt like you’ve done more this year, or less? Where have you seen God at work in 2020? Share your thoughts in the comments.
Here are brief summaries and links to blog posts from September 2020.
Did you watch the Presidential debate Tuesday night?
If your neighbor caught you at your mailbox, would you engage in a discussion about it? Or does even the thought of talking politics cause you panic?
If my dad were still here, I’m sure he would love to have a discussion about the debate. I just can’t decide which side he would be on.
We all know this saying:
“If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.”
It was the opposite in my house.
As I was growing up, Sunday lunch meant a homemade feast after church prepared by my mom in the kitchen (usually roast & potatoes, all manners of vegetables grown from the garden, a sweet dessert or two).
But the heat was in the dining room.
It was in the dining room that my dad would lead a fiery discussion. Maybe about what we agreed or disagreed with about the Sunday sermon. Or about politics. Or philosophy. Or anything really.
If you grew uncomfortable with the conversation, you fled to the kitchen to cool down and wash dishes with my mom.
I usually stayed in the dining room. The discussions were fun and lively. Our family and Sunday guests tossed around opinions both softly and loudly.
But when it was over and the dishes were all cleared? We were expected to remain friends. To still love each other. To promise to get together again soon and do it all again.
Are we still that civil today?
Sometimes I’d rather just hang out with my own people, stay in my own bubble. It feels safer. The divisions outside our bubbles seem sharper than ever.
But I remember my dad. And I believe this: he’d want me to keep having the discussions that he’s no longer here to have.
Books like this help promote healthy discussions: Beyond Your Bubble: How to Connect Across the Political Divide, Skills and Strategies for Conversations That Work.
In the book, author and professor Dr. Tania Israel gives us motivation and advice to carry on meaningful dialogues with those we disagree with.
“My aim is to support people who want to connect with those who have different political views and values by offering concrete skills, as well as overarching principles and strategies that will promote constructive conversation.”
Whether you enjoy talking politics or whether you hate it with a passion, Dr. Israel gives you ways to decrease the stress of how we talk to each other.
I’ve been testing Dr. Israel’s advice. When I get fiery feedback from friends on Instagram stories or Facebook posts, I try to stay engaged in a positive direction. I try to dig underneath the anger (theirs and mine!) to cultivate understanding instead.
But it’s hard. Sometimes I just want to hit delete and forget about it.
And sometimes I do just delete, with no regrets. It’s okay. There are times I need to be more like my mom, retreating to a quieter space (not necessarily the kitchen though) rather than stay in the dining room if the heated conversations have turned suffocating.
Even Dr. Israel points this out:
“Just because you can have dialogue doesn’t mean you must in every situation. It’s an opportunity, not a mandate.”
But other times, I need to stick it out. Stay with the dialogue. Make sure it ends with the friendship still intact.
Even if neither of us shift an inch in our position, if we show grace to each other along the way, I count it a win.
“Dialogue isn’t about winning. It’s about understanding.”
If you were here in person, we could talk about the debate together. But it’s not quite the same online.
I’ll wait until we can take it up in person over a kitchen table with a Krispy Kreme doughnut and a can of Dr. Pepper instead.
Here is important advice from Tania Israel in Beyond Your Bubble.
“Ask questions from a place of curiosity rather than judgment. Don’t try to lure someone into saying something inconsistent or incorrect and then leaping on them with a ‘gotcha’ – it won’t help anything, and it’s disrespectful.”
“It’s more important to simply be present than to be brilliant.“
“Vulnerability is not knowing how the other person will respond, but making space for it anyway. We need to embrace, or at least tolerate, this vulnerability if we want to understand another person more than we want to advocate for our own perspective.”
“The first rule of timing: don’t interrupt just to ask a question.”
“It’s a little bit magical how much people appreciate being heard and understood.”
“People’s tendency to believe that people on their side are motivated by love, and people on the other side are motivated by hate appears to be at the root of some of the world’s most intractable conflicts.”
“Focus on the relationship, and persuasion may follow.”
Do you enjoy talking politics? Or do you detest it? Share your thoughts in the comments.
My thanks to Net Galley
for the review copy of this book
There are worse crimes than burning books. One of them is not reading them.
—Joseph Brodsky
Here are 4 books I recommend from those I finished reading in September. See all my recommended books here.
1. Love Matters More
How Fighting to Be Right Keeps Us from Loving Like Jesus
by Jared Byas
Very good! Jared Byas (co-host of the podcast, The Bible for Normal People) writes about putting love first, as Jesus commanded. He reminds us that what we know is important, but perhaps more important is remember we don’t know everything. A life lived in truth is a life that prioritizes love.
My review here of Love Matters More
2. The Enneagram for Spiritual Formation
How Knowing Ourselves Can Make Us More Like Jesus
by A J Sherrill
After a few pages, this book seemed vaguely familiar. I believe it’s a rewrite with a new publisher from Sherrill’s original book, Enneagram and the Way of Jesus, which is no longer for sale. But even so, it’s a tighter book now. Sherrill explains how to use the Enneagram to enhance our spiritual growth in Christ, yet without feeling preachy or like a self-help book. He gives specific upstream and downstream practices for each of the 9 types.
My review here of The Enneagram for Spiritual Formation
3. Beyond Your Bubble
How to Connect Across the Political Divide, Skills and Strategies for Conversations That Work
by Tania Israel
A book for these times. The political divide feels sharper than ever. Tania Israel gives us skills here to bridge the gap through conversations and connections available to each of us. I also appreciate the staged conversations she set up between “Kevin” and “Celine” to show us how it can be done, to disagree yet still remain friends.
My review here of Beyond Your Bubble
4. Ask Again, Yes
by Mary Beth Keane
This heart-wrenching novel tells the stories of two rookie NYPD officers and their families. They live next door for years, and then tragedy strikes that threatens to tear their friendship apart. Except for a love relationship between their children. A tough but beautiful story.
Also finished but not really recommending:
Can’t Even
How Millennials Became the Burnout Generation
by Anne Helen Petersen
Maybe the timing wasn’t right. I trudged through this book, but never got excited about it. Petersen does make valid points about legitimate reasons that millennials feel burnout. Their generation faces different uphill obstacles that my generation, the boomers, didn’t have (my daughters are both millennials) on the job, in parenting, with technology, etc. But in the end, I hear Petersen’s stereotype when she writes: “…what I’ve come to understand as the boomer refrain: Stop whining, millennials — you don’t know what hard work is.” I don’t go that far. I do believe that millennials know hard work, as much as anybody else. But still, the book felt too long and too dark for me.
What good book are YOU reading this month? Please share in the comments.
My books on Goodreads
More books I recommend
sharing with Modern Mrs. Darcy
