Lisa notes

Find the Courage for One Small Thing

By LisaNotes January 31, 2025 Encouragement, Ripple: One Word 2025 29 Comments

The world has felt particularly overwhelming again the past few weeks.

I’m glad I have this memory to remind me of what to do about it. . . . .

It’s been a few months now, but I remember it clearly. My uncle was in the hospital again on a dreary day.

Until a bright light entered the room. . . in the form of the hospital housekeeper. As she entered the room, she bowed to my uncle. She turned and bowed to me.

Then, as she emptied the trash cans and swept the floor, she talked with my uncle, asking how he was doing.

She said she had come from Thailand. Another friend from Thailand who worked at the hospital had helped her get this job. She was very excited to have it.

Her accent was thick; my uncle’s hearing was poor. But they continued trying to talk with each other, brightening the room more and more with each miscommunication and ring of laughter.

Even when her work was finished, she stayed a little longer and chatted.

After she left the room, the day was a lot less gloomy.

Maybe it was a small thing she did, chatting to a sick man in a hospital bed while she cleaned up his garbage.

Or maybe it was the biggest dose of medicine that he got that day.

Alice Walker wrote about it beautifully in The Color Purple:

“Helped are those who find the courage to do at least one small thing each day to help the existence of another—plant, animal, river, or human being. They shall be joined by a multitude of the timid.”

When the world feels overwhelming, I want to remember to take Walker’s advice, and be helped by being like the hospital housekeeper from Thailand.

It doesn’t take a lot to ripple kindness into the world, to improve the existence of one other thing on the planet each day. But it can help a lot.

I wonder what your one thing will be today.

I wonder what mine will be, too.

How can you one small act of kindness ripple into the world this week? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Read more:

Share 4 Somethings – January 2025

By LisaNotes January 28, 2025 Life updates 14 Comments

I love how Jennifer tweaks our prompts each year for “Share 4 Somethings.” Write your own post and link up with Jennifer here for January.

The prompts for 2025 are:

  1. Some things we loved
  2. Some things we learned
  3. Some things that went well
  4. Some things we let go of

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Some things I loved

  • TIME WITH MY SIBLINGS 

My siblings and I had another working lunch this month to talk about selling our uncle’s estate. Although the circumstances are sad, I’ve loved being in closer relationship again with my siblings throughout this process.

  • ZOOM GROUP

I had two inspiring Zoom sessions this month with an online group I’m in. We talked about and made plans for our One Words. It really helped me get more specific with my goals for Ripple this year. (And also helped me realize I need to narrow down my goals; I have too many.)

  • BABY’S 30TH BIRTHDAY

I loved celebrating my baby girl Jenna turning 30 years old on Sunday with a family dinner. She’s a fantastic human being and it’s a joy to watch how she lives out her values in this world.

 ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Some things I learned

  • TOO SHORT HAIRCUT

I learned this month I need to be more specific with my hair stylist about how I want my hair cut. She always does a great job, but this time I must have been too vague about what I wanted. Next time I’ll be more clear. But in the meantime, at least my hair will keep growing.

  • HELPERS FOR VICTIMS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Jenna and I attended a domestic violence coalition this month in our area. I was amazed at how many different groups were represented among the helpers. It made me sad that there is such a need for this, but also grateful for so many people with kind hearts, willing hands, and expert skills to help those who are in abusive situations.

  • NEW MUSIC

I learned of some new (to me) musical artists when we were on St. Simon’s Island, GA. Their thoughtful lyrics really spoke to me. For example, they sung “knowing that small things matter is no small thing.” True!

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Some things that went well

  • A CLEAN COMFORTER

I finally took my bed comforter to the dry cleaners. It’s one of those things I kept putting off. But I did it, on what happened to be one of our coldest weeks, and picked it up the day before we got trapped in with snow. I’m thankful to check this task off my list.

  • SOUTHERN LIGHTS

My husband Jeff and I attended the Southern Lights gathering again this year, spending a weekend listening to great speakers/authors and having rich conversations with new and old friends. I came away renewed to stay committed to creating a more loving and compassionate world, regardless of what’s going on around us.

  • STORYWORTH WRAPUP

My year of writing personal stories for the Storyworth book that Jenna gifted us last year is almost finished. Thankfully, Storyworth gives you a few bonus months to review the stories and photos you want in your book. I hope to finalize 3 more stories, and then I’ll start the reviewing process. I’m amazed that Jeff and I actually wrote 52 stories each. It’s definitely an accomplishment for us, and proof that slow and steady does pay off.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Some things I let go of

  • BYE-BYE, NEW FRIDGE?

I’m ready to let go of my new refrigerator. Our old one died last year, so we replaced it in March with a new one. But our new fridge is very noisy and too cold, despite the repairman’s visits. They’re coming again this Friday—thankfully it’s still under warranty! But if they can’t fix it, I’m ready to start shopping for yet a different one (and I hate shopping).

  • PARTING WAYS

I’ve been sad to say goodbye to a longtime friendship this month. For a few years I’ve been asking for a conversation about a deep hurt I felt from our relationship. But she consistently refused to address it or stop the behavior. It’s painful to finally let go, but it had become more painful to stay.

  • THE LIFE I HAD PLANNED

I continue to wrestle in general and in specifics with letting go of life as I want it to be without certain losses. I committed several months ago to memorizing this quote to help me remember to accept the life I do have; it has helped.

“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.”
– Joseph Campbell

What are some things you are loving, things you are learning, things that have gone well, or things you’ve had to let go of this month?

Share your thoughts in the comments.

I’m linking at these blog parties

Let’s Kickstart Your One Word Journey for 2025
{One Word 2025 January Linkup}

By LisaNotes January 25, 2025 One Word Community, Ripple: One Word 2025 24 Comments

I’m excited to begin our One Word journeys together for 2025! 

Take a closer look at your One Word this month. Here are a few questions to get you started. Leave a comment below, have a conversation with a friend, or link a blog post below about anything related to your One Word.

1. WHAT DOES YOUR WORD LOOK LIKE?

Think creatively—can you photograph, draw, or design something that represents your word? Consider creating a vision board or even a vision bowl with objects that symbolize your word.

I created a vision jar, putting objects related to my word in a ripply-looking cookie jar. I’ll write a separate blog post about each item soon. It was so fun and meaningful to put this together!

2. WHERE IS YOUR WORD?

Where can you place your word so it stays on your radar? Where have you already noticed your word showing up in your life?

I created a logo for my word Ripple to use on my blog all year. I also printed it out and taped it to my bedroom mirror, underneath my 2024 word Curiosity, which I still want to remember.

Ripple One Word 2025

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3. WHY THIS WORD?

Why did you choose this word? What challenges do you anticipate, and how might you navigate them? Write out your answers now, then save them to revisit in December. Bonus: share your reflections with at least one other person—it can spark great conversations and extra ideas!

I’m choosing Ripple as my guiding word because it represents two key ideas: taking intentional action (dropping a pebble into the water) and embracing a sense of surrender (accepting that I can’t control how the ripples spread). Both are essential for me right now.

My challenges? Fear or hopelessness sometimes hold me back from taking action, while my desire for control makes it difficult to release my grip. I’m still working on a plan to navigate these challenges.

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Today’s linkup will remain open for two weeks from Saturday, January 25, through Saturday, February 8.

Our February linkup begins on Tuesday, February 25. We’ll have new challenges and a linkup on the 25th of each month throughout 2025—mark your calendars.  

Have you chosen One Word for 2025? Why this word? Please leave a comment here.

If you’d like to receive our monthly One Word emails and ideas, join here any time of the year.

Link Up About Your One Word!

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

Love His Famous Quotes But Read Less Popular Ones Too – The Voice of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

By LisaNotes January 20, 2025 Book quotes, Discrimination 10 Comments

Hatred and bitterness can never cure the disease of fear; only love can do that.

Most of us have heard this famous quote from Martin Luther King, Jr.:

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”

It’s a beautiful truth.

Dr. King’s words are as powerful in our decade as they were in the 1960s.

Yet King said many more things than the few famous quotes we hear the third Monday of every January. I pass along a challenge to you that was given to me some years ago: read more of King’s original works.

One of my favorites is a collection of his sermons in Strength to Love. Many of the quotes below are from that book.

You can find King’s words online and in print quite easily. If you want to further the cause of equality and love in our country, read some of these inspired words.

And then use what you read by loving those around you.

  • Whoever they are.
  • Whatever they look like.
  • Whatever they believe.

We’re all in this together.

“We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope. Only in this way shall we live without the fatigue of bitterness and the drain of resentment.”
– Martin Luther King, Jr., Strength to Love

And if you need to hear Dr. King’s voice again, listen here.

[If you can’t see the video, watch here]

Quotes from Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“We must learn that passively to accept an unjust system is to cooperate with that system, and thereby to become a participant in its evil.”

~ * ~

“It should now be apparent that sincerity and conscientiousness in themselves are not enough. History has proven that these noble virtues may degenerate into tragic vices. Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”

~ * ~

“Our most fruitful course is to stand firm with courageous determination, move forward nonviolently amid obstacles and setbacks, accept disappointments, and cling to hope.”

~ * ~

“Courage, therefore, is the power of the mind to overcome fear. Unlike anxiety, fear has a definite object which may be faced, analyzed, attacked, and, if need be, endured.”

~ * ~

“We say that war is a consequence of hate, but close scrutiny reveals this sequence: first fear, then hate, then war, and finally deeper hatred.”

~ * ~

“Is there a cure for these annoying fears that pervert our personal lives? Yes, a deep and abiding commitment to the way of love.”

~ * ~

“Make a career of humanity. Commit yourself to the noble struggle for equal rights. You will make a better person of yourself, a greater nation of your country, and a finer world to live in.”

~ * ~

“We need leaders not in love with money but in love with justice. Not in love with publicity but in love with humanity.”

* * *

Have you read any of Dr. King’s writings? His “I have a dream” speech? Please share in the comments.

revised from the archives

Related:

Is Cynicism Destroying Us?

By LisaNotes January 17, 2025 Encouragement 7 Comments

Two Senators, Two Perspectives

The two senators from my state walk into two press conferences. They’re both asked their opinions on the California fires.

One senator bluntly declares that Californians “don’t deserve” help. The other, while acknowledging financial constraints, says, “The people of California need to know that America stands with them, and that’s the message I plan to send.”

Which senator would you want representing you?

  • The cynical and stingy one?
  • Or the discerning and compassionate one?

Make it more personal:

  • Which senator would you want as a friend if you were in tough times?
  • And, maybe more importantly, which person would you hope to be if someone needs your help?

The Rise of Cynicism

As someone who cares deeply about politics and our democracy, I’m troubled as I wrestle with cynicism myself. Which politicians are trustworthy, and which ones are as detestable as they appear?

I know I’m not alone in the struggle. Cynicism is on the rise across America.

  • In 1972, nearly half of Americans agreed with the statement, “Most people can be trusted.”
  • By 2018, only 33% felt that way.
  • By 2025? I can’t imagine how much further that number has fallen.

How cynical are you?

Consider these three statements from Jamili Zaki’s book, Hope for Cynics:

  1. No one cares much what happens to you.
  2. Most people dislike helping others.
  3. Most people are honest chiefly through fear of getting caught.

Zaki says that the more statements you agree with, the more likely you are to be suspicious of family, friends, and strangers.

Cynicism vs. Skepticism

I don’t want to be cynical. Cynical people aren’t pleasant. They aren’t approachable. They aren’t helpful.

So what can we do to avoid cynicism? One of Zaki’s suggestions surprised me: become skeptical.

I often confuse cynicism and skepticism, but they are actually quite different from each other. Zaki defines cynicism as a lack of faith in people, but skepticism as a lack of faith in assumptions.

To practice skepticism instead of cynicism:

  • Notice when you think you already know all the answers.
  • Question your assumptions; ask yourself why you hold this opinion.
  • Pay closer attention to what you actually see and hear in front of you.

When I do that, I am reminded that people are pretty good after all. For example, when I watch clips of volunteers helping fire victims in California, I’m uplifted. I remember that most people do step up for each other in times of trouble.

Humanity is kinder than we often give it credit for.

But what about the truly bad stuff? Of course there are people who do bad things. Some people prove they aren’t worthy of our trust. (Some of those people may be politicians?!!)

But I believe the harmful, selfish ones are in the minority. Far more people do good things. I see them. I hear them.

And I want to learn from them.

The Path Forward

Skepticism helps us remain open to the goodness in the world. It allows us to hold opinions lightly, collect evidence, and challenge our own biases. It reminds us that not all people or institutions are untrustworthy.

It’s unhealthy to be distrustful of everything.

The sorting of America isn’t working in our favor. If “my side” entirely distrusts “your side” and vice versa, we’ll never uncover shared values or work toward a better future together.

But instead, if we ask questions instead of making hateful assumptions, if we listen to each other’s stories instead of opinions only, and if we celebrate common ground when we find it, we might begin to heal some of our rifts.

Zaki says,

  • Trust loudly.
  • Savor goodness with others.
  • Put hopeful skepticism into action.

As I watch my two senators take opposite approaches to the California fire victims, I see one driven by cynicism and distrust, while the other is motivated by compassion and hope.

I know which senator is making a more positive difference with their attitude, and which one continues to create more headaches for everybody.

Because cynicism hurts everyone, not just the cynic.

But skepticism? It might just open the door to connection, healing, and a brighter path forward.

Watch for kindness around you. You might be amazed at what you find. I know I am.

I still believe most people can be trusted. I see too much good in them to remain a cynic.

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Share your thoughts in the comments.

Which Family Member Do You Wish You’d Known Better?

By LisaNotes January 14, 2025 Grandparenting, Ripple: One Word 2025 15 Comments

Did you ever wish you could drive? What was fun to you? Could you imagine living outside of Mississippi?

During my childhood years in the 1960s and 1970s, my siblings and I often went to Mississippi during the summers to stay two weeks with my grandparents. (Except for my youngest sister; she cried to stay home, so Mama let her.)

We would stay one week with Mamaw (my paternal grandmother) in Springville, and one week with Granddaddy and Grandma (my maternal grandparents) in Toccopola.

I remember making mud pies outside in the yard at Mamaw’s, and walking to the store to buy candy at Grandma’s.

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Late 1960s, Grandma and me

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1987, Mamaw and me

But overall I have only a handful of memories from those summers. I wish I had more. Especially of my grandmothers.

My grandmothers seemed very different from each other. Though they lived only a few miles apart in rural Mississippi—both grew up in poor farming families, working hard for what little they had—I viewed Mamaw as the more country woman (she had no air conditioning in her house where she birthed her babies and eventually died) and I saw Grandma as the more city woman (she lived in a neighborhood and near a store).

Mamaw was a homebody who loved taking care of her chickens and her yard dogs. Grandma liked buying purses and shoes and dressing up for church.

I would like to have known my grandmothers more. I would like to have understood their backstories.

  • Were they in love when they married, or did they marry more for convenience?
  • Did they feel oppressed as women, not voting, not driving, not having a job? Could they even imagine an alternative?
  • What would they have changed in their cultures, if they could have?

I wish I could ask them these questions and more.

Like, did they see us grandkids as different too? Being one of four kids in my family, I always felt I was just part of a group. Did my grandmothers distinguish much among us? Did they see us as just “the grandkids” or did they know each of us as individuals, too?

If I could have them both back for a day, I’d love to get to know them more as individuals too. I’d learn more about who they were and understand better how their lives rippled out into mine. I’d also want to see what they would think of this granddaughter who is now all grown up with grandchildren of her own.

Instead, I can only talk with family members living in my life right now. It’s these people I can see as the unique individuals they are. I can get to know them better and let them know they are loved. And I can share my own backstory to those who are curious to know.

Who would you like to have known better? Who can you get to know better?

Now is the time.

Share in the comments.