On the Blog – April 2020

Here are brief summaries and links to blog posts from April 2020.

On the Blog - 2020-04_feat


When You Need to Stay Where You Resist Being

“The wall we are pounding upon, tempted to walk away from, or passively disappearing at, is actually a well where Jesus is inviting us to sit with Him, drink life-giving water, and stay. Yes, stay.
– Anjuli Paschall

Easier NOT to Stay

Sometimes it’s easier to run away than stay. Or easier to just distract ourselves. Or even easier to just fight back.

And sometimes each of those is the correct response.

But other times, we need to just stay. And sit. And experience.

This has been one of those times.

[SIDE NOTE: Ironically, I finished reading Paschall’s book Stay before I’d ever heard of COVID-19. Also pre-quarantine, I read Do Nothing and The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry. And The Grumble-Free Year. Um, God? He did lead me to choose “Linger” as my One Word for 2020. But sheltering-in-place didn’t cross my mind.]

Stay Where You Resist

I’m challenged by this statement in the book Stay by Anjuli Paschall:

“Stay where you most resist being.”

Paschall isn’t talking about literal, dangerous situations. If you’re being threatened, don’t stay. Take appropriate action; get away.

She also wasn’t writing about physically staying in our homes, because who knew that was coming? (But now? It applies.) 

Instead, she was writing about staying with God in our pain instead of running away.

In this time of a global pandemic, we may feel a general sense of anxiety. But rather than think it through or feel it out, we’d rather do other things with our disturbing thoughts.

  • We may deny the thoughts altogether.
  • We may drown them in food or substances.
  • We may shift to distractions of probabilities or preparations or just plain ol’ worrying.

But what if, instead, we stayed with the anxiety long enough to really see it, to root out its source?

Look underneath the generalities. Are there specific anxious thoughts that need addressing? 

Linger to See Then Release

I’m trying now to take a longer pause when I feel anxious. Not to indulge it; that’s not helpful either.

But I need to stay with it long enough to understand it, inviting Holy Spirit to show me what I need to see.

And then, let it go.

Too often we try to let it go before we look at it head-on.

It’s uncomfortable to stay.

But Jesus invites us to stay. With him. Paschall says,

“We have to let the ache be exposed. We have to stay with the pain. We have to let all the nerve endings rise to the surface and let the stinging make us weak. This is where we meet God.

When we stay, He comes. We have to be real with God in order to find real help from God.”

We don’t have to be strong to stay. We just have to be willing.

Paschall also says,

“Jesus is the kind host, inviting us to linger, spill the milk, break a dish, be known, and stay, not as guests, but as daughters.

He wants to hear our laughter, comfort our ache, ask us questions, and heal our hurts. God, in love, always welcomes us to stay and dine at the table with Him. He is cultivating a home within us. This is the sacred gift of staying.”

And when others need us to sit and stay with them, we can do that, too. To listen to them. To listen for God.

Stay at the table. Eat the meal. Then leave together.

And live a more whole, healthier life as a result of the staying.

“When I stay right where I am, with all that is beautiful and bent out of shape, I find God. I find love waiting for me.

I want to stay for Love.


Are you tired of “staying”? Please share your thoughts in the comments.

My thanks to Net Galley
for the review copy of Stay


4 Books I Recommend – April 2020

Reading is as important as ever these days. Both for information. And for escape. I’ve done a little of both this month, although neither as much as usual. 

For a moment in time we leave ourselves; and when we return, sometimes expanded and strengthened, we are changed both intellectually and emotionally. 
– Maryanne Wolf

Here are books I recommend from April. See all my recommended books here.

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Nonfiction

1. The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry
How to Stay Emotionally Healthy and Spiritually Alive in the Chaos of the Modern World
by John Mark Comer

Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

This is another book that was written before its time, and is especially pertinent now (also see Do Nothing by Celeste Headlee). John Mark Comer, a Christian pastor, writes about how he learned to slow down and eliminate hurry from his own life. He offers us ways to do it as well. But it’s not a how-to book.

“The problem isn’t when you have a lot to do; it’s when you have too much to do and the only way to keep the quota up is to hurry. That kind of busy is what has us all reeling.”

Read my review here about The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

2. The Art of Living
Peace and Freedom in the Here and Now
by Thích Nhất Hạnh

Art of Living

My book club recently finished this one (we’ve now started Brene Brown’s Braving the Wilderness). Thích Nhất Hạnh is a gentle Vietnamese spiritual leader who reminds us to live consciously. He works through seven practices in this book to help us do that. I didn’t agree with everything, but with plenty to make this book a wonderful read.

“Freedom is a practice and a habit. We have to train ourselves to walk as a free person, sit as a free person, and eat as a free person. We need to train ourselves how to live.”

3. Human(kind)
How Reclaiming Human worth and Embracing Radical Kindness Will Bring Us Back Together
by Ashlee Eiland

Human(kind)

This is a beautiful collection of essays by a beautiful black woman who grew up in majority-white spaces. She shares stories that both remind us that racism still exists, yet give us hope for future transformation.

“But maybe it’s worth showing up anyway. Maybe we still show up just to prove that kindness and proximity aren’t always about our comfort. We keep showing up to remind ourselves that dignity and hope weigh more than humiliation’s sting.”

Fiction

4. A Spark of Light
by Jodi Picoult

A Spark of Light

The Picoult novels I’ve read aren’t emotionally easy books. This one is no exception. It’s about a gunman taking over a women’s reproductive clinic in Mississippi. One of the hostages, Wren, is caught up in the gunfire as her dad, the police hostage negotiator, works outside. This novel forces you to look at emotions from all angles, not necessarily to change your stand, but to help you be more understanding.

“This is what it means to be human. We are all just canvases for our scars.”

Reading Now

  • Write Better
    A Lifelong Editor on Craft, Art, and Spirituality

    by Andrew T. Le Peau
  • Upstream
    The Quest to Solve Problems Before They Happen
    by Dan Heath
  • I’ve Seen the End of You
    A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know
    by W. Lee Warren
  • You’re a Miracle (and a Pain in the A**)
    Understanding the Hidden Forces That Make You You
    by Mike McHargue (Science Mike)
  • The Truth about Us
    The Very Good News about How Very Bad We Are
    by Brant Hansen

* * *

What good book are YOU reading this month? Please share in the comments.

My books on Goodreads
More books I recommend


Will Life Go Back to Normal?—Grace & Truth Link-Up

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Back in January, could you have possibly pictured all that has happened in 2020, even in your wildest imagination?

Watch this comedian go back in time to visit her younger self, four months earlier:

Woman Goes Back Four Months_video

It’s also hard to imagine what things will look like four months from now. 

As different areas of the country open back up, even as of today, we all wonder: Will things ever go back to normal?

And we fear the answer: Probably not.

We will live in a new normal now. And we have another new normal still to come.

Some things we won’t like.

But hopefully, some things will be better, if we learn our lessons right.

Our Featured Post

In our featured post this week, Jerralea points out one main lesson we’re learning: we all now know life can change in an instant.

In her post “Even when it looks scary…” Jerralea reminds us about the momentous life-changing event of Jesus’s followers at the empty tomb. (And we think WE have been through a range of emotions! Imagine all they went through in a week.)

Read Jerralea’s post here and be encouraged about our new normal.

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Thanks for sharing, Jerralea! Here’s a button for your blog.

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Grace and Truth_Meet Hosts

MAREE DEE – Embracing the Unexpected
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

HEATHER HART & VALERIE RIESE – Candidly Christian
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LAUREN SPARKS
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LISA BURGESS – Lisa notes
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

Grace and Truth_Rules

We pray that Grace & Truth will point you to Jesus. Add your post to encourage others in the Christian blogging community.

1. Follow your hosts on their blogs and/or social media channels, if you’d like.

2. Share 1 or 2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. (No DIY, crafts, recipes, or inappropriate articles.)

3. Visit and comment on 1 or 2 other links. Be an encourager. Please don’t link and run.

4. All links are randomly sorted. Link early or late. The playing field is even.

To Be Featured:

5. Post the button or link back to one of our hosts. It encourages new participants. (Not mandatory to participate, but required to be featured.)

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6. Every host will feature and promote one blog every week. 

Now Let’s Link Up!

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

Do you think life will go back to normal? How will the new normal look for you? Please share your thoughts in the comments


Is It Okay to Do Nothing?

I’m noticing two waves of thought concerning our quarantine time.

(1) Be productive!
Now is the time to clean out those closets. Learn a new language. Repaint the house.

Or,

(2) Take a break!
Read for fun. Sleep later each morning. Go for leisurely walks.

Which is your approach?

Okay to do nothing

Some of you may not have a choice. Depending on your job and life season—you’re homeschooling kids or you’re working twice as hard as a nurse, etc.—your life may have sped up without you getting to decide.

But for many of us, our time schedule is more under our control than ever before. With many of our outside obligations removed, we are the master of our time at home.

What ‘should’ we do with our extra time?

Over the Christmas break I typically do a jigsaw puzzle. It’s a special treat for me. I actually lose track of time when I’m doing a puzzle (and it always surprises me when this happens). So I limit puzzles to that one time a year. Because even though I enjoy it in the moment, it feels wasteful in itself.

But I didn’t buy a new puzzle last Christmas. (At least not grown-up puzzles. I did 5-piece puzzles with my granddaughter instead. Even more fun!)

So I had no new puzzles in the house when quarantine hit. My choices now on the shelves at Walmart were only two boxes. 

Apparently after buying up food and toilet paper, shoppers bought out puzzles and games. Puzzlemakers can’t keep up with the demand. 

SIDE NOTE:
Here’s an interesting list from Walmart’s CEO of hot items in the quarantine.

    • Week 1: Hand sanitizers, soaps and disinfectants
    • Week 2: Toilet paper
    • Week 3 and 4: Spiral hams and baking yeast (for Easter)
    • Now in Week 5: Hair clippers and hair dye (Feeling shaggy yet? I keep eyeing my scissors)

I bought one of the two boxes left. But instead of one large puzzle (which I wanted), this box had 4 tiny puzzles (150 pieces), 4 small ones (300 pieces), and 4 medium ones (500 pieces).

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But unless it’s Saturday or Sunday afternoon, I still feel guilty doing puzzles. Why?

In Celeste Headlee’s new book, Do Nothing: How to Break Away from Overworking, Overdoing, and Underliving, she says:

“We are members of the cult of efficiency, and we’re killing ourselves with productivity.”

Headlee had no idea when she wrote this book how much we were going to need it this year. When I first read it in January, I didn’t agree with everything. But maybe I need to read it again since the arrival of COVID-19.

Too often we overestimate the value of useful things we put into the world.

During normal “work hours,” I feel I should be productive doing things that matter, not something like putting a puzzle together. I don’t want to be lazy. I have negative thoughts about idleness.

I need to redefine my attitudes about idleness.

“Improvement is healthy, but not every moment of your day should be leveraged in an attempt to make you a better person.

If you’re searching for the fastest way to learn guitar because you also have to squeeze in yoga and keto cooking recipes and homemade charcoal facial peels, you have left no time to simply be the person you are.

You are leaving no space for rest and contentment.” 
– Celeste Headlee

Especially now, our attitudes of “improvement” can work against us.

While we do still need to do certain things every day—routines are more helpful than ever—we also need to let some things go.

We need to release the pressure on ourselves to “do” more, and instead accept the gift of time to “be” more.

When I’m working on a puzzle, I’m simply “being.”

“Research shows you can lift your mood simply by taking a walk; no need to track your steps. I’d like to inspire a new consideration of leisure and a new appreciation for idleness. Idleness in this sense does not mean inactivity, but instead nonproductive activity.” 
– Celeste Headlee

In this season of a global pandemic, I’m giving myself permission to invest more in leisure. To throw off self-inflicted pressure to be productive. To grab a blanket and a favorite book instead. To trust that God will prompt me to do what needs doing, but will also enjoy our extra time together doing nothing.

I’m still pacing myself with my puzzles. I only have twelve, after all, and we don’t know how long this quarantine will last. So far I’ve finished four. And I’m itching to start a fifth. When I do a puzzle, it’s my version of doing nothing.

And I enjoy it.

It’s okay to do nothing sometimes. If we lose touch with our being, our doing is wasted. Less doing can produce better being.

So just be. Schedule it in, if you must. See what happens.

It will be okay.


Do you struggle with doing nothing, or does it come easy to you? Please share in the comments.

My thanks to NetGalley
for the review copy of this book


Are You More Discouraged or Afraid? – Grace & Truth Link-up

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Discouraged or Afraid?

They are two different emotions, discouragement and fear. It’s likely you’ve had a dose of both in the past month.

We can become discouraged when our plans are continuously blocked. And become afraid when we or our loved ones seem in danger.

When faced with either of these emotions, it’s helpful to examine our foundation for hope.

  • What are we believing in?
  • Where does our trust lie?
  • What makes us feel safe?

Our Featured Post

As our featured post today, consider Beth Steffaniak’s questions at her post here,How Much Do You Trust God in Time of Crisis?”

Beth asks us to evaluate ourselves on ten statements, including these three:

3. Even though God may not remove the trials in my life, I’m still confident that He is with and protecting me (Isaiah 43:2).

5. When I feel weak, I take that as my cue to turn my weaknesses over to Jesus for His power to work through them perfectly (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).

8. When troubles come, I consistently remind myself that God is using these times to strengthen my trust in Him (2 Corinthians 1:8-9).

I encourage you to read Beth’s post to find your own weak links to pray about. As she says, “the need to encourage myself (yourself too) in the Lord has never been more needed.”

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Thanks for sharing, Beth! Here’s a button for your blog.

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Grace and Truth_Meet Hosts

MAREE DEE – Embracing the Unexpected
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

HEATHER HART & VALERIE RIESE – Candidly Christian
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LAUREN SPARKS
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LISA BURGESS – Lisa notes
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

Grace and Truth_Rules

We pray that Grace & Truth will point you to Jesus. Add your post to encourage others in the Christian blogging community.

1. Follow your hosts on their blogs and/or social media channels, if you’d like.

2. Share 1 or 2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. (No DIY, crafts, recipes, or inappropriate articles.)

3. Visit and comment on 1 or 2 other links. Be an encourager. Please don’t link and run.

4. All links are randomly sorted. Link early or late. The playing field is even.

To Be Featured:

5. Post the button or link back to one of our hosts. It encourages new participants. (Not mandatory to participate, but required to be featured.)

Grace Truth_Button

6. Every host will feature and promote one blog every week. 

Now Let’s Link Up!

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

Do you struggle more with discouragement or with fear? Please share your thoughts in the comments