What If You Hadn’t . . . Upstream and Downstream

If You Hadn’t?

  • What if you hadn’t buckled your seat belt?
  • What if you hadn’t kept your blood pressure under control?
  • What if you hadn’t had kids?

What if you hadn’t stayed home the past few weeks?

What didn't happen

We rarely know the answers to these kind of questions. The things we prevent from happening aren’t easily measured. These are upstream things.

It’s easier to measure downstream things . . . fires we put out, addictions we overcame, criminals we arrested.

As states reopen, either in phases or full-out, some are saying our stay-at-home efforts were in vain because the coronavirus didn’t get out of hand in our state.

True? Not true? How can we know?

We often undervalue what DIDN’T happen if we can’t measure it. We never know how many fires didn’t happen because someone practiced fire prevention.

We don’t know how many people didn’t get COVID-19 because of our staying at home. 

Work from Upstream 

Staying at home has been an upstream activity.

Dan Heath explains upstream activities in his excellent new book, Upstream: The Quest to Solve Problems Before They Happen. 

“Downstream actions react to problems once they’ve occurred; upstream efforts aim to prevent those problems from happening.”

By staying home, we prevented many health problems from occurring.

But we can’t prove that. Heath explains “the prophet’s dilemma“: it’s a prediction that prevents what it predicts from happening, a self-defeating prediction.

“What if Chicken Little’s warnings actually stopped the sky from falling? The Y2K bug was an example of the prophet’s dilemma. The warnings that the sky would fall triggered the very actions that kept the sky from falling. Maybe what society needs is a new generation of enlightened Chicken Littles.”

We often preach upstream principles to our children. We’d rather them say no to a dangerous behavior from the get-go instead of saying yes and dealing with consequences later.

It’s also what God does with us. He advises upstream behaviors for our benefit, to keep our lives wholesome and healthy and as problem-free as possible.

More Downstream to Come?

So now what will happen? With the silencing of Chicken Little’s voice, more businesses are opening again.

We’ll find out in a few weeks if the gamble was worth it.

And if there are more new cases and spikes in hospitalizations? We’ll have to do more downstream work of throwing life preservers.

We can pay to fix problems once they happen, or we can pay in advance to prevent them.”

We’ll always need people around to do the downstream work. Things happen and we need rescues. God’s grace is the best downstream gift I know. Doctors and nurses are downstream gifts, too. 

“We will always want someone there to rescue us. The point is that our attention is grossly asymmetrical. We spend our lives consumed with problems that we might have avoided altogether.”

If I can avoid a problem or two altogether, I’d prefer that.

I plan on continuing coronavirus upstream actions awhile longer: staying home as much as possible, wearing a mask when I’m out, and practicing social-distancing.

I’ll try to be patient in the process. It can take awhile to see which fruit grows from either staying home or from going out.

“Downstream work is narrow and fast. Upstream is broad and slow(er).”

Taking an upstream approach isn’t always popular. Or easy. But it’s usually worth it.


Please share your thoughts in the comments.

Thanks to Net Galley
for the review copy of Upstream


So, What DO You Know?—Grace & Truth Link-Up

 

Uncomfortable with Uncertainty

We haven’t canceled yet.

Our reservation is still on for June. But building sandcastles on Panama City Beach and playing in the Gulf waters with our kids and grandkids seems very iffy.

I realize, even in the best of times, we can’t accurately predict next month. People get sick. Work crunches happen. Unexpected scenarios pop up.

We learn to live with a little uncertainty.

But the uncertainty of these times? It’s maxed out. We can’t even predict when we’ll see pork chops at the grocery store again, not to mention who might catch the coronavirus and be quarantined, or worse, for two weeks.

I don’t like it. Uncertainty makes me anxious.

“Intolerance of uncertainty is the most important element in worry.” Yes, Robert Leahy, I agree.

So to calm my worries, I’m reminding myself more and more these days:

I don’t know, but God does.
I don’t know, but God does.
I don’t know, but God does.

I can’t demand certainty from anything in this life. God—as love and as goodness—is the only unchangeable thing I know.

Everything else? It’s subject to change, and mostly out of my control.

Whether we make footprints on the hot sand next month beside baby and toddler feet, or whether Jeff and I just take another lap around the neighborhood, alone, on a sticky Alabama evening, is unpredictable.

I just don’t know that. But God does.

That’s what I do know.

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Our Featured Post

Our featured post this month is by Karen Del Tatto.

How to Trust God in Times of Uncertainty

Karen gives us great advice, looking at what the Bible says about the future and showing us how to have faith in uncertain times.

“We may live in uncertain times, but for those who are in Christ Jesus, our future is certain and secure. If we can trust God with our eternal future, we can certainly trust Him with our lives here on earth.”

Read it all here. 

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Thanks for sharing, Karen! Here’s a button for your blog.

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Grace and Truth_Rules

1. Share 1 or 2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. (No DIY, crafts, recipes, or inappropriate articles.) All links are randomly sorted.

2. Comment on 1 or 2 other links. Grace & Truth linkup encourages community.   

3. Every host features one entry from the previous week. To be featured, include this button or link back here on your post (mandatory to be featured, but not to participate).

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Grace and Truth_Meet Hosts

We encourage you to follow our hosts on their blogs or social media.

MAREE DEE – Embracing the Unexpected
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

HEATHER HART & VALERIE RIESE – Candidly Christian
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LAUREN SPARKS
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LISA BURGESS – Lisa notes
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

Now Let’s Link Up!

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

What plans have you had to cancel? What plans are you still holding loosely for the future? Please share your thoughts in the comments


5 Links, Books, and Things I Love—May 2020

Every month I share my list of favorite 5’s.

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  • 5 interesting things online
  • 5 funny memes
  • 5 articles about words
  • 5 pictures of things I love
  • 5 things on the blog

What are you enjoying this month?

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5 Things Around the Web

The Reason You’re Exhausted Is ‘Moral Fatigue’

What was once a small decision now feels like it could be life or death.

20 Questions to Ask Instead of “How are you doing right now?”

And how to get a better answer than, “Hanging in there.”

Arguing with Your Partner About Household Chores During COVID-19?

Here are 13 suggestions from Gretchen Rubin to help ease tension in relationships.

Lockdown was supposed to be an introvert’s paradise. It’s not.

“For introverts, extroverts, and everyone in between, is the bizarre feeling of being socially overwhelmed despite the fact that we’re staying as far away from each other as we can.”

Meet the Illustrators Who Gave the Coronavirus Its Face

Here’s an interesting backstory about the little red coronavirus illustration we’re all VERY familiar with by now.

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5 Memes

More funny memes. We all need to laugh more, right?

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5 Things with Words and Books

8 Pandemic Words & Phrases People Absolutely Never Want To Hear Again

What words are you tired of hearing? This list includes: new normal, social distancing, and trying times.

A Side Effect of the Covid-19 Pandemic? Reading Got a Lot Harder

Yes! These university students—and their professor—have trouble focusing on their reading. 

7 Digital Libraries You Can Visit from Your Couch

I haven’t visited these yet (my library’s digital collection is more than enough for me), but it’s good to know these are available.

How Reading Books Helps Your Brain Recharge

Find a good book you love and recharge.

4 Books I Recommend

Reading was hard the first half of April (see above article). But it’s getting easier again each week.  

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5 Things I Love

The Grands

We made a day trip in April to see the grandbabies. I couldn’t stand it any longer. Our youngest granddaughter has started sitting up and our oldest is talking in paragraphs. Jenna took the best photos, so they will sustain me for a little while.

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5 Things on the Blog

When You Need to Stay Where You Resist Being

Even when it may be easier to run away, sometimes we need to stay. With our pain. With God. With love. Excerpts from Stay by Anjuli Paschall.

Will Life Go Back to Normal?

Will things ever go back to normal? Probably not. But hopefully, some things will be better, if we learn our lessons right.

Just One at a Time

Keep reaching out, one at a time. Isolation will end; relationships won’t.

Is It Okay to Do Nothing?

It’s okay to do nothing sometimes. If we lose touch with our being, our doing is wasted. Just be. See what happens.

Congratulate Yourself – Thanks for How You’re Helping

Congratulate yourself. There are a lot of ways to help people through this crisis. Don’t underestimate your way.


What sustained you in April? What are you looking forward to in May? Please share in the comments.

previous Links and Books


The Call to Come Close—Grace & Truth Link-Up

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Check Your Closeness

We visited with my in-laws (Jeff’s parents) this week. It was the first time in two months. We’d been delaying a visit because they are in a high-risk category.

But we decided with safe physical distancing, we could talk outside for a bit.

And it was delightful. For them and for us.

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But it was also weird. We had to check our internal calls to get closer. We typically hug hello and hug good-bye. We typically sit close and chat.

Not this time.

The life-and-death risk outweighed the benefits. For them and for us. 

Concerns Are No Joke

Back in the moon shot days of the 1960s, scientists encountered a similar threat. They weren’t sure if the astronauts would leave potentially destructive germs on the moon (forward contamination). And/or if the astronauts coming back from the moon would bring potentially destructive organisms back to the earth (backward contamination).

Dan Heath explains it in Upstream. He adds,

It might be tempting to mock these fears now, with the infallibility of hindsight, but this concern was no joke. Existential risk was in the air.”

One day we may look back on 2020 and see we were unduly afraid of risks that weren’t valid.

But right now? We’re still in the unknown. Existential risk is in the air.

NASA still keeps up its efforts to reduce contamination. Catharine Conley was one of the Planetary Protection Officers (formerly called the Planetary Quarantine Officer, interestingly enough). Conley said,

“So far as I can tell, planetary protection is the first time in human history that humans as a global species decided to prevent damage before we were capable of doing something.”

Heath adds, “May there be a second time.”

This is a second time. 

Heath didn’t know when he wrote the book that as I was reading it, we are living in the second time.

May we continue to proactively prevent damage to each other.

Our Featured Post

In our featured post, “Draw Near,” blogger Linda Gill writes about drawing near, while staying apart, with her prayer partners on a Monday morning. It’s a beautiful story.

And so is her conclusion. Linda writes,

“BUT…the sweet news I share is that we are never…no NEVER…far from Jesus. He calls us to be near to Him.”

Read it all here. Linda always shares gentle, godly wisdom at her blog, beingwoven.org.

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Thanks for sharing, Linda! Here’s a button for your blog.

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Grace and Truth_Meet Hosts

MAREE DEE – Embracing the Unexpected
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

HEATHER HART & VALERIE RIESE – Candidly Christian
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LAUREN SPARKS
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

LISA BURGESS – Lisa notes
Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

Grace and Truth_Rules

We pray that Grace & Truth will point you to Jesus. Add your post to encourage others in the Christian blogging community.

1. Follow your hosts on their blogs and/or social media channels, if you’d like.

2. Share 1 or 2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. (No DIY, crafts, recipes, or inappropriate articles.)

3. Visit and comment on 1 or 2 other links. Be an encourager. Please don’t link and run.

4. All links are randomly sorted. Link early or late. The playing field is even.

To Be Featured:

5. Post the button or link back to one of our hosts. It encourages new participants. (Not mandatory to participate, but required to be featured.)

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6. Every host will feature and promote one blog every week. 

Now Let’s Link Up!

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

Who have you missed seeing in person? In which situations have you practiced social-distancing?  Please share your thoughts in the comments


On the Blog – April 2020

Here are brief summaries and links to blog posts from April 2020.

On the Blog - 2020-04_feat


When You Need to Stay Where You Resist Being

“The wall we are pounding upon, tempted to walk away from, or passively disappearing at, is actually a well where Jesus is inviting us to sit with Him, drink life-giving water, and stay. Yes, stay.
– Anjuli Paschall

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Easier NOT to Stay

Sometimes it’s easier to run away than stay. Or easier to just distract ourselves. Or even easier to just fight back.

And sometimes each of those is the correct response.

But other times, we need to just stay. And sit. And experience.

This has been one of those times.

[SIDE NOTE: Ironically, I finished reading Paschall’s book Stay before I’d ever heard of COVID-19. Also pre-quarantine, I read Do Nothing and The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry. And The Grumble-Free Year. Um, God? He did lead me to choose “Linger” as my One Word for 2020. But sheltering-in-place didn’t cross my mind.]

Stay Where You Resist

I’m challenged by this statement in the book Stay by Anjuli Paschall:

“Stay where you most resist being.”

Paschall isn’t talking about literal, dangerous situations. If you’re being threatened, don’t stay. Take appropriate action; get away.

She also wasn’t writing about physically staying in our homes, because who knew that was coming? (But now? It applies.) 

Instead, she was writing about staying with God in our pain instead of running away.

In this time of a global pandemic, we may feel a general sense of anxiety. But rather than think it through or feel it out, we’d rather do other things with our disturbing thoughts.

  • We may deny the thoughts altogether.
  • We may drown them in food or substances.
  • We may shift to distractions of probabilities or preparations or just plain ol’ worrying.

But what if, instead, we stayed with the anxiety long enough to really see it, to root out its source?

Look underneath the generalities. Are there specific anxious thoughts that need addressing? 

Linger to See Then Release

I’m trying now to take a longer pause when I feel anxious. Not to indulge it; that’s not helpful either.

But I need to stay with it long enough to understand it, inviting Holy Spirit to show me what I need to see.

And then, let it go.

Too often we try to let it go before we look at it head-on.

It’s uncomfortable to stay.

But Jesus invites us to stay. With him. Paschall says,

“We have to let the ache be exposed. We have to stay with the pain. We have to let all the nerve endings rise to the surface and let the stinging make us weak. This is where we meet God.

When we stay, He comes. We have to be real with God in order to find real help from God.”

We don’t have to be strong to stay. We just have to be willing.

Paschall also says,

“Jesus is the kind host, inviting us to linger, spill the milk, break a dish, be known, and stay, not as guests, but as daughters.

He wants to hear our laughter, comfort our ache, ask us questions, and heal our hurts. God, in love, always welcomes us to stay and dine at the table with Him. He is cultivating a home within us. This is the sacred gift of staying.”

And when others need us to sit and stay with them, we can do that, too. To listen to them. To listen for God.

Stay at the table. Eat the meal. Then leave together.

And live a more whole, healthier life as a result of the staying.

“When I stay right where I am, with all that is beautiful and bent out of shape, I find God. I find love waiting for me.

I want to stay for Love.


Are you tired of “staying”? Please share your thoughts in the comments.

My thanks to Net Galley
for the review copy of Stay