Lisa notes

Did you watch the Presidential debate Tuesday night?

If your neighbor caught you at your mailbox, would you engage in a discussion about it? Or does even the thought of talking politics cause you panic?

Can You Stand the Heat?

If my dad were still here, I’m sure he would love to have a discussion about the debate. I just can’t decide which side he would be on.

We all know this saying:

“If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.”

It was the opposite in my house.

As I was growing up, Sunday lunch meant a homemade feast after church prepared by my mom in the kitchen (usually roast & potatoes, all manners of vegetables grown from the garden, a sweet dessert or two).

But the heat was in the dining room.

It was in the dining room that my dad would lead a fiery discussion. Maybe about what we agreed or disagreed with about the Sunday sermon. Or about politics. Or philosophy. Or anything really. 

If you grew uncomfortable with the conversation, you fled to the kitchen to cool down and wash dishes with my mom.

I usually stayed in the dining room. The discussions were fun and lively. Our family and Sunday guests tossed around opinions both softly and loudly.

But when it was over and the dishes were all cleared? We were expected to remain friends. To still love each other. To promise to get together again soon and do it all again.

Are we still that civil today?

Get Out of Our Bubbles

Sometimes I’d rather just hang out with my own people, stay in my own bubble. It feels safer. The divisions outside our bubbles seem sharper than ever.

But I remember my dad. And I believe this: he’d want me to keep having the discussions that he’s no longer here to have.

Books like this help promote healthy discussions: Beyond Your Bubble: How to Connect Across the Political Divide, Skills and Strategies for Conversations That Work.

In the book, author and professor Dr. Tania Israel gives us motivation and advice to carry on meaningful dialogues with those we disagree with.

“My aim is to support people who want to connect with those who have different political views and values by offering concrete skills, as well as overarching principles and strategies that will promote constructive conversation.”

Whether you enjoy talking politics or whether you hate it with a passion, Dr. Israel gives you ways to decrease the stress of how we talk to each other.

I’ve been testing Dr. Israel’s advice. When I get fiery feedback from friends on Instagram stories or Facebook posts, I try to stay engaged in a positive direction. I try to dig underneath the anger (theirs and mine!) to cultivate understanding instead.

But it’s hard. Sometimes I just want to hit delete and forget about it.

And sometimes I do just delete, with no regrets. It’s okay. There are times I need to be more like my mom, retreating to a quieter space (not necessarily the kitchen though) rather than stay in the dining room if the heated conversations have turned suffocating.

Even Dr. Israel points this out:

“Just because you can have dialogue doesn’t mean you must in every situation. It’s an opportunity, not a mandate.”

But other times, I need to stick it out. Stay with the dialogue. Make sure it ends with the friendship still intact.

Even if neither of us shift an inch in our position, if we show grace to each other along the way, I count it a win.

“Dialogue isn’t about winning. It’s about understanding.”

If you were here in person, we could talk about the debate together. But it’s not quite the same online.

I’ll wait until we can take it up in person over a kitchen table with a Krispy Kreme doughnut and a can of Dr. Pepper instead.

Tips from Beyond Your Bubble

Here is important advice from Tania Israel in Beyond Your Bubble.

“Ask questions from a place of curiosity rather than judgment. Don’t try to lure someone into saying something inconsistent or incorrect and then leaping on them with a ‘gotcha’ – it won’t help anything, and it’s disrespectful.”

“It’s more important to simply be present than to be brilliant.“

“Vulnerability is not knowing how the other person will respond, but making space for it anyway. We need to embrace, or at least tolerate, this vulnerability if we want to understand another person more than we want to advocate for our own perspective.”

“The first rule of timing: don’t interrupt just to ask a question.”

“It’s a little bit magical how much people appreciate being heard and understood.”

“People’s tendency to believe that people on their side are motivated by love, and people on the other side are motivated by hate appears to be at the root of some of the world’s most intractable conflicts.”

“Focus on the relationship, and persuasion may follow.”

Do you enjoy talking politics? Or do you detest it? Share your thoughts in the comments.

My thanks to Net Galley
for the review copy of this book

If you need to be challenged in your status quo beliefs about evangelical identity and don’t mind being politely nudged out of your biblical comfort zone, this book will do it for you.

After Evangelicalism: The Path to a New Christianity is David Gushee’s analysis of modern-day faith, biblical interpretation, and church life. And where to go next.

Gushee writes about the good and the bad, the helpful and the harmful. He addresses numerous topics in our everyday lives and how they intersect with our Christianity, such as:

• Evangelical Biblicism
• Hearing God’s Voice Beyond Scripture
• Theology of Believing and Belonging
• Jesus According to . . .
• Biblical Theology of Church
• Christian Political Ethics
• White Racist Christianity

The book is organized well. Each chapter ends with a “Takeaways” section, with bulleted key points. (Chapter summaries are always a plus to me.)

Gushee also provides a humorous, non-scientific Evangelical Test to see if you qualify as an “American evangelical.” If you check twenty or more boxes, you are, or were, an evangelical. See how you do. (I knew 24 out of 25; I won’t say if that’s a good thing or bad.)

Should you read this book? Be warned that this book isn’t for the faint of faith. Toes will be stepped on. Here’s an example in the chapter on race:

“White American Christianity, flowing from European imperial colonialism and justifying slavery, was born in racist heresy and the sin that it caused. . . . There have been many pivotal moments in US history when opportunities existed for the abandonment of white supremacism, but these have mainly been missed.”

And you might not be comfortable with all the topics he addresses, especially the chapters on sex and politics. You might also disagree with his interpretation of scripture in certain paragraphs. Or his views about scripture in general.

“Inerrantist claims go beyond the Bible’s own claims for itself and often create unnecessary faith crises for believers.”

But if you’re up for some mental stimulation and internal spiritual wrestling, read After Evangelicalism. You should come away thinking a little differently than you came in—hopefully more clearly and more loving, even if you diverge on opinions with the author here and there.

Whichever category you fit in—Still-Vangelicals, Still Christians, or Still People (categories provided in the Appendix written by Isaiah Ritzmann), you’ll find information here to think about. 

Here are more quotes from the book:

“Post-evangelicals are abandoning church for reasons peculiar to the American evangelical experience, including disillusionment over harmful teachings, reactionary attitudes toward science and liberal learning, right-wing politics, and having been violated or traumatized.”

“The sense that card-carrying American evangelicalism now requires acquiescence to attitudes and practices that negate core teachings of Jesus is fueling today’s massive exodus.”

“Seven commitments of a post-evangelical politics are proposed: a distinctive Christian identity, action based on hope and not fear, critical distance from earthly powers, grounding the broad Christian social teaching tradition, global perspective, orientation toward serving God’s kingdom and the common good, and efforts to practice what we preach.”

Share your thoughts here.

My thanks to Net Galley and Westminster John
Knox Press for the review copy of this book