They Don’t Have to Understand {Mantra 24}

They don’t have to understand.

This is one of the hardest mantras for me to accept.

I really like to be understood.

When Jeff and I have a disagreement, I’m okay if he doesn’t agree with my opinion. But I really want him to understand what I’m saying.

But there are times when people won’t understand. Or won’t even try.

And although that hurts, I want to be less offended by it and not take it personally.

I’m still learning how to release this desire to be understood. I’m digging at the roots. I’m working with God on it.

I do realize it’s impossible to be understood by everybody all the time.

It’s impossible to even understand ourselves all the time.

So as I continue to practice this mantra, I want to remember this:

Not only do others not have to understand us all the time, we don’t even have to tell our side of the story every time.

We will be misunderstood. We will misunderstand others. This will happen again and again.

But if God understands us and we at least halfway understand ourselves, sometimes that can be enough for us. Maybe not always, but sometimes. 

And if we let it, not being understood can be an opportunity to grow in humility. I understand I need that. 


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You are on Day #24 of the series: Find Your Mantra {28 Daily Mantras}

Find Your Mantra: 28 Daily Mantras

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Whatever happens, we’ll handle it” {Mantra 23}

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Why do you ask?” {Mantra 25}

13 thoughts on “They Don’t Have to Understand {Mantra 24}

  1. blankAnita Ojeda

    Oh, I’m with you on this one! I want people to understand me (most likely because I want them to like me). And I always want to tell my side of the story and explain (often exhausting others in the process). This is a good mantra to remember!

  2. blankJerralea

    I think there is a longing in everyone to be understood. But I think we might feel we should be understood ALL THE TIME and that’s just not possible.

    This is a novel thought: “we don’t even have to tell our side of the story every time!” I’m kind of guilty of thinking I should explain every time.

  3. blankTrudy

    This is a toughie for me, too, Lisa. Thank you for the reminder that God understands us! When I feel down and not understood by someone, I often have to remind myself of that immovable truth! Love and blessings of peace and hope to you!

  4. blankLisa Blair

    Realizing others don’t have to understand was a big aha moment for me which actually released me into greater freedom. I became free to hear from the Spirit of God to share or not share with others because helping them to understand me was no longer the point.

  5. blankLinda Stoll

    ‘But if God understands us and we at least halfway understand ourselves, sometimes that can be enough …’

    Um, yes. Absolutely, friend. When we fully appreciate His heart toward us, everything and everyone else falls into their rightful place.

    I appreciate your tender words.

  6. blankRichella J Parham

    “Not only do others not have to understand us all the time, we don’t even have to tell our side of the story every time.” Such good words! Dallas Willard has helped me so much with this. . . but I have a long way to go. Thanks for the encouragement.

    And thanks for joining the Grace at Home party. I’m featuring you this week, Lisa–I so appreciate all that you share.

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