Lisa notes

7 Books I Recommend—September 2022

By LisaNotes September 26, 2022 Books I Recommend 28 Comments

“I find television very educational. Every time someone switches it on, I go into another room and read a good book.”
– Groucho Marx

Well, I don’t do necessarily do that every time (Groucho Marx might not have either), but he does have a point.

Here are books I recommend from what I finished reading in September.

[See previously recommended books here]

NONFICTION

1. Now What?
How to Move Forward When We’re Divided
by Sarah Stewart Holland, Beth Silvers

Have you lost connection with someone you once were close to due to conflict over politics, religion, social issues, etc.? Sarah and Beth from the podcast Pantsuit Politics don’t offer a step-by-step solution in this new book, but they do offer a general path forward to finding peace again in spite of our seeming divisions. Helpful and encouraging.

“Life is about presence. Connection is not zero-sum. Our presence in one another’s lives has to become more visible than our conflicts.”

“Now what? Keep moving forward. Keep showing up with all of your gifts and your desires and your discernment about how you can contribute more by loving more, even when you disagree with your people about basically everything for always.”

2. Beating Guns
Hope for People Who Are Weary of Violence
by Shane Claiborne, Michael Martin

We’re all disturbed by gun violence. This book shows how gun deaths are both a heart problem and a gun problem. It’s full of statistics that reveal just how extensive our problem has been for many years. But it also points us to a way out, if we’re willing. I highly recommend this book for all of us. You’ll pick up on a Christian perspective in it, but you don’t have to be a Christian to benefit from this book.

“A gun is much more likely to be used in a suicide, a domestic homicide, or an accidental shooting than it is to be used to ward off a criminal.”

“We have been better at protecting guns than protecting people.”

“Every human is created in the image of God. We have love in our DNA. There is something in almost every person that recognizes that killing is wrong.”

3. Why I Left Church to Find Jesus
A Personal Odyssey
by Julie McVey

The title drew me to this Kindle Unlimited book (my free 3-month Amazon account will expire soon). Julie McVey explains her interesting yet painful journey in and out of organized religion in this short book. Many will relate to her story.

“I’d rather stand before God and Him tell me I loved too much and that my love clouded my judgment than Him tell me I didn’t love enough and that my judgment clouded my love.”

4. Overdue
Reckoning with the Public Library
by Amanda Oliver

I frequent my library continually to borrow its many books. Why do you use the library? For many people, it’s more complicated than checking out books. Former librarian Amanda Oliver writes about her years as a librarian in Washington, DC, in a high-poverty neighborhood. She tells an important story about how we should think about modern libraries and how they’re evolving.

5. Get Untamed
The Journal
by Glennon Doyle

This colorful journal is an accompaniment to Glennon Doyle’s bestseller Untamed. But reading the book isn’t a prerequisite. I worked through the journal with a small group of women in a zoom group. The questions provoked lots of thought and conversation among us. Like all journals, you get out of it what you put into it.

FICTION

6. The Downstairs Neighbor
by Helen Cooper

When a teenage girl disappears in London, the neighbors in the apartment all become suspects through their own circumstances. Intriguing and well-told, this novel kept me wondering what would be uncovered next.

7. The Last House on the Street
by Helen Cooper

Highly recommend. This novel flips back and forth between 1965 and 2010 in a town in North Carolina. The search for justice ties both generations together in a mysterious yet important plot of social justice and family security.

READING NOW

Nonviolent Communication
A Language of Life
by Marshall B. Rosenberg
Share Your Stuff. I’ll Go First.
10 Questions to Take Your Friendships to the Next Level
by Laura Tremaine
Beyond the Enneagram
An Invitation to Experience a More Centered Life with God
by Marilyn Vancil
Radical Compassion
Learning to Love Yourself and Your World with the Practice of RAIN
by Tara Brach
100% Right 50% of the Time
How to Prevent Fallacies in Decision Making
Yassour, Yossi
Thing Explainer
Complicated Stuff in Simple Words
by Randall Munroe

What good book are YOU reading this month? Please share in the comments.

More books I recommend

sharing at these linkups

Share Four Somethings—September 2022

By LisaNotes September 23, 2022 Life updates 26 Comments

Near the end of each month, I share four somethings at Heather’s.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Something Loved

ROADSIDE ATTRACTIONS

Well, this is more something my husband Jeff loves. But because I love Jeff (we just celebrated our 30th anniversary!), and I see the enjoyment he gets from chasing down roadside attractions when we’re on trips, I have to love them, too.

On our latest trip through Dallas, Texas, I got photos of Jeff with these four big items found on his Roadside Attractions app.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Something Gleaned

THIS IS YOUR FIRST TIME

My new favorite book on grief is It’s OK That You’re Not OK: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn’t Understand by Megan Devine. It’s truly fabulous.

Regardless of what you may be grieving now, big or small, this quote from Megan is applicable:

“No matter how many times pain or grief has entered your life, this time is the first time. This grief is unlike any other. Each new experience gets to unfold—and be tended—in the ways that best suit what hurts.”

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Something Braved

NEW BUCKET LIST ITEM

Okay, maybe “bravery” isn’t required for this. More like stamina.

It’s geeky-sounding, I realize. But our new bucket list item is to visit all the current 15 Presidential Library and Museums of the modern era.

Every US President since Herbert Hoover has created a library (but it’s more like a museum) in their home state to display exhibits about their life and career. They include the fascinating gifts they receive from foreign countries, audio and video of important events in history during their era, and multitudes of exhibits.

Several libraries are also the final burial sites of the President and their spouse.

Prior to September, we’d been to three.

Abraham Lincoln in Springfield, Illinois
Jimmy Carter in Atlanta, Georgia
Bill Clinton in Little Rock, Arkansas

But two weeks ago, we visited three more. My sore feet can attest to how interesting they are.

Harry S. Truman in Independence, Missouri
George H. W. Bush in College Station, Texas
George W. Bush in Dallas, Texas

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Something Achieved

FINISHED INVISALIGN

After wearing braces as a teen, I wish I’d known then to continue wearing my retainer at night.

I’ve spent the past 11 months wearing invisible aligners on my teeth to get them straight again. But I finished with Invisalign this month. The orthodontic treatment was much easier this time (no more goopy molds of your teeth!), but it was still a hassle.

Kids, wear your retainers!

Share your thoughts in the comments.

If I Did This . . . {September One Word Linkup}

By LisaNotes September 22, 2022 One Word Community 14 Comments

Share Your One Word Update

Link your One Word blog post below. Share an update about your One Word in the comments.

“If I did this . . . ” Challenge

Sometimes our One Word “works” or doesn’t “work” based on other things happening in our lives.

Are any of those circumstances within your control?

As you exercise your word the next 30 days, see how you would fill in these blanks.

I could have more [YOUR ONE WORD] in my life if:

I did this _______________.
I didn’t do this: _______________.

Try journaling or praying to decide which responsibilities belong to you and which ones don’t.

This One Word linkup will remain open through Friday night, September 30.

The next linkup opens on Saturday, October 22.

Every One Word blog post you link is shared in our One Word Facebook group throughout the month.

Leave a comment here about your One Word.

Get more One Word ideas here

Link Up About Your One Word!

Let Go of This to Make Quicker Decisions

By LisaNotes September 20, 2022 Encouragement, Release: One Word 2022 12 Comments

The Pain of Decision-Making

Should I hit “send” on the email? I’m only asking my acquaintance for more information, after all. My email won’t commit me to joining their zoom group.

Yet even this feels like a decision I’m unprepared to make. I’m torn. I don’t know what to do.

And it’s painful.

If you’re ever caught in this conundrum of making a decision, you understand the feeling.

Discomfort of Uncertainty

You know if you decide too quickly, you might regret it. New information may become available to indicate you made a poor decision. Or you might get locked into something you can’t get out of it, preventing you from taking a better opportunity that comes up later.

However, if you decide too slowly, you could drain away precious time needed for preparation. Or you might respond so late that you miss out on the opportunity altogether.

At the very least, delaying your decision keeps you in an uncomfortable state of uncertainty until the decision is made.

More Info, Please

A few days before my acquaintance’s zoom meeting, I finally do send an email asking a few questions.

Typically, gathering more information is a standard tool to help make a decision.

(But even then, you have to decide how much new information is enough. And the new information can sometimes complicate the matter even further.)

I know the deadline is approaching for the zoom meeting. If I don’t make a decision soon, it’ll be too late.

So I decide to send my email.

Release This for Quicker Decisions

And before long, I receive a reply. The information I receive is limited. It tells the meeting time, how to get the zoom link, what’s on the agenda, etc.

But then comes the zinger.

And this becomes the deciding factor:

“Remember, no pressure! Even after the meeting, if you decide it’s not for you, no worries!”

Ah! That does it. I sign up.

As usual, I’d put too much pressure on myself to make the right decision.

While some of our decisions are life-defining, most aren’t. My indecision is too often based on wanting to make the perfect decision.

But rarely is there a perfect decision. There may be a better or worse choice, perhaps more helpful or less helpful, but rarely 100% right or wrong. And even if I do make a poor decision, I can still ask for help to turn it back around.

I’m thankful for that. As I release the pressure of perfectionism, I can make my decisions more quickly instead of too slowly.

I’m glad I’ve now made the decision about the zoom group. At most, it will only cost me two hours of a Saturday morning. Then I can bow out from future meetings if I decide to.

Goodbye, perfectionism.

I gain peace and clarity moving forward.

And I eliminate the discomfort of indecision.

Do you tend to make decisions too quickly or too slowly? What helps you? Share in the comments.

Releasing perfectionism is part of my journey with my one word Release for 2022.

See more posts here on Release:

How to Practice Your Purpose

By LisaNotes September 13, 2022 Encouragement, My stories, Spiritual disciplines 63 Comments

What Happened to Hank?

Hank (not his real name) confused me.

Week after week he wandered inside Manna House mumbling, sometimes singing. He’d carry boxes. He’d unload fruit. He’d return a cart to the back (and you best get out of his way).

Everybody knew him. And treated him with care.

I finally got it, too: locked inside this 70ish year old body was the intellect of a young child.

But then Hank disappeared.

On a night away from Manna House, Hank was crossing the street as usual from his low-rent apartment complex to a nearby convenience store.

But this time he didn’t make it across the street.

Hank was hit by a van. He fell to the ground.

A few neighbors in his complex were looking out their windows that night. They witnessed not only the hit, but something else.

Something very eerie . . .

Put Him in the Van

The neighbors knew Hank because Hank loved them.

When he volunteered at Manna House, it wasn’t just to serve the people who lined up there. It was also to help his neighbors back home. When he’d load up his own box of food to take home, he always packed extra to distribute to others. (I learned early on not to touch anything in Hank’s box. It was his to give away.)

But on the night of this hit-and-run, Hank was the one needing love.

The intoxicated driver and the passenger stepped out of the van. They saw Hank motionless on the pavement.

They then made another bad decision that night. Instead of calling for help, they decided to do away with the evidence.

They lifted Hank’s body to load him into their van.

Watchful Eyes

But what the driver and passenger couldn’t have imagined was this: many eyes were watching from the windows of Hank’s apartment complex. They wouldn’t allow this to happen to their Hank. Their fingers quickly dialed 911 and the police arrived before the van got away.

Things still looked bad for Hank. Because of the jostling, his injuries were now even worse. He was in ICU day after day after day. No one knew if this grown man with a child’s mind would ever recover.

But friends came. Friends visited. Friends prayed.

Little by little, Hank got better. And lot by lot, Hank received love.

A few months later, on a Wednesday night before food distribution was to begin at Manna House, Fran prayed about Hank. As she was thanking God for his recovery, I heard shuffling feet around the corner.

There came Hank.

Still Has Purpose

Hank was oblivious to any attention on his account. He wore a neck brace. He wasn’t mumbling to himself or singing like I had been used to him doing, but he was still Hank.

He still had purpose.

He was gathering cans of food into a clean garbage bag. His driver asked if he needed that much, and he said he had to take it to his neighbors. She said okay. Because she knew he would give it to them.

This was how he loved his neighbors. And they loved him for it.

Hank wasn’t finished here yet. An old man with a small mind but a big heart was still in use. Nobody could take that away before its time.

Practice Your Purpose

A few years later during the pandemic, Hank’s health deteriorated. He eventually had to leave his beloved apartment and friends, and move into a nursing home.

It was there one afternoon that a friend was visiting with Hank. After they talked a bit, Hank said his goodbyes. His soul left his body.

But his spirit lives on. He is still remembered at Manna House and at his apartment complex by those who loved him and by those he loved.

Living with purpose is being like Hank. It is loving with purpose.

Loving is our purpose, regardless of who we are, where we are, or what we have.

And as long as we’re here, we’re not done either.

* * *

Loving others is one way to practice living with purpose. Share in the comments how you live with purpose.

Read more spiritual practices here:

revised from the archives

Two Women Died on September 8
—Grace & Truth Linkup

By LisaNotes September 9, 2022 Grace & Truth Link-Up, My stories 26 Comments

Where Were You September 8?

Where were you when you heard the news?

Many will remember September 8. It’s the day she died.

She was loved by her family. She was well-known among her friends. She was a giver and a doer and an amazing woman.

I’m not talking about the Queen of England. Yes, she was those things.

But on September 8, 2010, it was my mother who died.

Light Growing Dim

My mom had been living with Alzheimer’s for a few years prior to September 8, 2010. Her quality of life had remained high, though, despite her disease.

But when my father died of cancer in their bedroom on Valentine’s Day also of 2010, my mother’s light grew dimmer.

Off and on for the next several months, she lost her desire to live. Whether she remembered clearly or not that her dear husband was gone, she intuitively knew somebody was missing.

And it drained her.

Her memory began to drain away even quicker. Her energy also drained. And eventually even her appetite to eat or drink ran dry.

Her Final Breath

On September 7, the night before she died, my siblings and I had been taking turns staying with her in her room at her assisted living facility. She was restless, occasionally even getting out of bed to walk in circles around the room.

Did she know she was in her final 24 hours?

When dawn arose, my brother, my sisters, and I all gathered around her in her bed, awaiting the end together.

When Mama’s final breath also drained away, no more air ever to inhale again, we were left holding the pain of her loss.

And the beauty of her memory.

On September 8, 2022, the Queen of England also breathed her last. She will be talked about all over the world for many days, months, and years to come. Her deeds will be noted and praised on every news outlet. Stories will be written and numerous memorials will be held.

It wasn’t that way when my mama died.

The Big Thing

My mother had many friends, too, don’t misunderstand. She was well-known for her good deeds and her gracious hospitality in our small community. And when she died, may people were sad. Many people still are.

But my mother’s name didn’t make every newscast (or any). Photos of her weren’t displayed by millions around the world. She only had one service to memorialize her godly life.

Yet my mama was no less important, no less valuable than the Queen. At least to me. To those who did knew her and loved her.

Some people are important and known to many. Others are just as important even though known only to a few.

The quantity of fame doesn’t determine a life. Quality does.

And my mom lived a quality life. She may not have done “big” things according to world events.

But she was my big thing.

She was no less important to me than the Queen of England (God rest her soul). Because Mama was MY mother. You only get one of those.

And she was mine. That’s big.

I wouldn’t have traded her for any other woman in the world.

Not even for the Queen of England.

* * *

Every life is equally important. Share your thoughts in the comments.

Read More:

Grace & Truth Featured Post

If you find yourself becoming anxious over a situation, a relationship, or a circumstance, Donna suggests that curiosity is one tool you can use to your advantage.

“Setting aside judgement of yourself and others, frees you to gently explore and accept the truth, rather than fueling more anxiety through self-condemnation, catastrophizing, and false narratives.”

She writes that curiosity can help us open our minds to God’s perspective, too. Give it a try.

Read all of Donna’s post here at her blog, then link up your own blog posts below.

“How Curiosity Tames Anxiety”

Review the rules here about adding your most recent Christian Living posts and how to be the Featured Post. Visit all four hosts social media here or websites here: Maree Dee, Lisa notes, Lauren Sparks, Tammy Kennington.

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