Lisa notes

Are We Grateful for Opportunities to Practice Forgiveness?
—Grace & Truth Linkup

By LisaNotes April 29, 2022 Grace, Grace & Truth Link-Up 8 Comments

“I am grateful for every opportunity I have had to forgive.”
~ Susan Hunt

I’m not there.

But I want to be.

Equipped to Forgive

Opportunities to forgive are opportunities to drink deeper from God’s fountain of grace.

And as grace satisfies, it also equips. The more we learn how to forgive, the more equipped we are to help others heal from their own hurts, too.

Author Susan Hunt in Spiritual Mothering illustrates this forgiveness cycle by repeating Abigail’s story in the Hebrew scriptures (1 Samuel 25). Abigail’s husband Nabal was a gruff man. He displayed his roughness at an inopportune time when David asked him for help. Nabal refused to help David.

So Abigail took it upon herself to intervene directly with David.

What does this have to do with forgiveness?

Abigail strongly encouraged David to forgive both her presumption in approaching David as well as to forgive Nabal’s foolishness. She didn’t want David to have an avenging murder on his record.

How was Abigail equipped to encourage forgiveness?

Susan Hunt suggests it’s because Abigail must have practiced forgiveness herself, proof of having survived a marriage with Nabal for years. While Abigail was described as beautiful, it was also said she was discerning. She was more than just a pretty face.

Like Abigail, if we want to help people forgive other people, we need to have our own experiences with forgiveness.

Only forgivers can teach forgiveness with credibility.

Challenge

Susan Hunt offers this challenge to practice forgiving others:

If there is anyone you are having difficulty forgiving, make a list of what it will cost you to forgive and what it will cost you not to forgive. Then, by God’s grace, forgive.

I need to take that challenge. Not only for my own good, but so that I’ll be a better example to others of how to forgive.

And I often need others to forgive me.

How about you?

revised from the archives

* * *

Featured Post

How can our imagination help (or hinder) our ability to forgive?

Beth Willlis Miller offers four strategies for imagination to apply when we have been hurt.

Read all of Beth’s post here at her blog, then link up your own blog posts below.

“I Can Only Imagine…”

Do you have someone you need to forgive today? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Thanks for sharing, Beth! Here’s a button for your blog.

I’m linking at these blog parties

1. Share 1 or 2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. (No DIY, crafts, recipes, or inappropriate articles.) All links are randomly sorted.

2. Comment on 1 or 2 other links. Grace & Truth linkup encourages community.

3. Every host features one entry from the previous week. To be featured, include this button or link back here on your post (mandatory to be featured, but not to participate).

We encourage you to follow our hosts on their blogs or social media.

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6 Books I Recommend—April 2022

By LisaNotes April 28, 2022 Books I Recommend 37 Comments

Books can be dangerous. The best ones should be labeled: “This could change your life.”
– Helen Exley

Here are 6 books I recommend from what I finished reading in April.

[See previously recommended books here]

Nonfiction

1. The Power of Regret
How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward
by Daniel H. Pink

Everyone has regrets (even though not everyone realizes it). Our first thought is: regrets are horrible. But in Daniel Pink’s excellent new book, he shows us that regret can be used to our advantage, if we’re willing to put in the work. As with Pink’s other bestsellers, this one is full of interesting stories and an easy-to-follow structure.

2. Self-Compassion
The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself
by Kristin Neff

I don’t know where to begin with how good this book is! This one will make my top 10 list of books I read in 2022. Bottom line: we’ve overestimated our pursuit of self-esteem the past few decades and grossly underestimated the value of self-compassion. If we want to make the world a better place, self-compassion is a necessary starting point.

3. Stupid Things I Won’t Do When I Get Old
by Steven Petrow

I got this book for the funny things. And it did make me laugh. But it also had poignant chapters about things not do to when you get old.

Here are some chapters:

I won’t lie about my age
I won’t become a cranky curmudgeon
I won’t refuse to change my ways
I won’t wait until I’m deaf to get a hearing aid
I won’t whine about how much things cost
I won’t postpone for tomorrow what matters to me today

4. Shaking the Gates of Hell
A Search for Family and Truth in the Wake of the Civil Rights Revolution
by John Archibald

Content of a book may be king, but beautiful writing is a close second for me. This book offers both. This is an honest (and often painful) telling of a life in Alabama in the 1960s by John Archibald, who is the son of a Methodist preacher AND a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and columnist that I’ve read for years. He pulls no punches, but he does it with such style. I didn’t want it to end.

5. Good Enough
40ish Devotionals for a Life of Imperfection
by Kate Bowler

I read this book during Lent. It was a beautiful reminder that God is with us and for us in ALL parts of our lives, not just the sunny, happy parts. Perfection not required. The structure was a beautiful blend of stories, blessings, and to-do’s (Good Enough Steps).

Fiction

6. Flygirl
by Sherri L. Smith

This young-adult novel is about Ida Mae Jones’ dream of becoming a pilot during World War 2. But her obstacles are: she’s a female and she’s black. This is a gentle chronicle of the burdens of her journey. Through the story you get a true-life education about the WASP, the Women Airforce Service Pilots.

Reading Now

The Four Winds
by Kristin Hannah
Bittersweet
How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole
by Susan Cain
Whole Brain Living
The Anatomy of Choice and the Four Characters That Drive Our Life
by Jill Bolte Taylor
Fearing Bravely
Risking Love for Our Neighbors, Strangers, and Enemies
by Catherine McNiel
Do I Stay Christian?
A Guide for the Doubters, the Disappointed, and the Disillusioned
by Brian D. McLaren
Plays Well with Others
The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know about Relationships Is (Mostly) Wrong
by Eric Barker
Undistracted
Capture Your Purpose. Rediscover Your Joy.
by Bob Goff

What good book are YOU reading this month? Please share in the comments.

More books I recommend

sharing at these linkups

Is Patience Always a Virtue?

By LisaNotes April 26, 2022 Encouragement 15 Comments

The Last Bit of Toothpaste

It’s getting dark outside, almost bedtime. Jeff is in the bathroom brushing his teeth.

I walk into the bathroom too and grab my toothbrush. Jeff hands me the toothpaste tube. It’s been squeezed so much already that surely another drop can’t come out.

I say thanks but no thanks. I give the tube back to him.

And I reach for my own tube of toothpaste in the drawer.

He suddenly laughs and laughs.

I don’t get it. At first….

How Patient Are You?

Many people (myself included) don’t think they’re patient. We think we’re bad at waiting. And maybe we often are. (I was on hold with AT&T last week when my internet went down; don’t ask me about my patience.)

But maybe it’s not patience in general that we lack. Maybe our patience level is just dependent on what we’re being patient for.

For instance, Jeff and I do this unspoken thing with the ham.

We buy a full ham at the grocery store to have on hand for sandwiches. But we know we’ll never eat the whole ham before it goes bad.

So after the package is opened, it needs to be divided into smaller packages to put in the freezer. It’s a bit of a hassle. You have to fight with the saran wrap, and use up some of your time to do it.

Thus, nobody wants to open the ham.

If you’re first, you’re responsible for putting it up.

But if you can wait out the other person, they’ll have to do it and you’ll be scot-free.

It sounds ridiculous, I realize, and also quite selfish, which aren’t top traits we like to label ourselves with.

But what does this waiting bring out in us?

Patience.

Incredible amounts of patience. Patience we never knew we had. I can patiently wait to open the the ham for days, thinking Jeff will get to it before I do. And he likewise.

More Patient Than We Know

The same thing is happening now with the toothpaste.

Jeff has been waiting for me to get tired of squeezing the tube so I would hunt through the drawer to find the new tube (and I confess, it can be a scary hunt through the drawer).

But when I pull out a different toothpaste I’ve been using for weeks—a separate brand I’ve been trying for sensitive teeth—Jeff confesses he has been holding out for naught.

He has been so patient.

So now he laughs. He had only been waiting on himself. He could have waited forever.

And I laugh too. I totally relate; it’s the kind of thing I do as well.

I may not always be patient with him, but I can be quite patient with my own procrastination, with my own avoidance of work, with my own faults.

I may not be patient enough with others. But am I too patient with my own procrastination, too patient with my own avoidance of work, too patient with my own faults?

Maybe we’re all more patient than we think.

And maybe patience isn’t always a virtue?

* * *

Do you consider yourself patient? Share in the comments.

sharing at these linkups

Share Four Somethings—April 2022

By LisaNotes April 22, 2022 Life updates 24 Comments

Near the end of each month I share four somethings with others at Heather’s.

The four categories are:

something loved,
something gleaned,
something braved (OR something saved), and
something achieved.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Something Loved

INSTAGRAM “FOLLOWING” OPTION

I’m so glad Instagram recently added the option of choosing a chronological feed for accounts I follow instead of the default Home feed based on algorithms.

I also no longer have to see ads or recommended accounts. For now anyway. Yay!

Something Gleaned

LEARN FROM YOUR REGRETS

Daniel Pink is one of my favorite authors. His latest book is another winner, The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward.

Are your regrets more about things you didn’t do but wish you had, or about things you did do that you wish you hadn’t?

Pink says inaction regrets outnumber action regrets by nearly two to one.

To “ease the sting” of a regret, he suggests you switch from thoughts of “If only” to “At least” (especially for action regrets). Fascinating book!

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Something Braved

AN ONLINE COACH

I’ve found counselors to be a big help through rough patches in various seasons of my life. But it’s always hard for me to take the initiative to find the right counselor, make an appointment, and go to the first visit.

This week I scheduled a free 15-minute informational session with an online coach who is an expert on my current dilemma.

And I’m so glad I did. We really clicked and have already had a great first session, which was so helpful.

Doing brave things doesn’t come naturally to me. I hope pushing through my discomfort will pay off in the long run.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Something Achieved

FINISHING 30 DAYS OF YOGA

One of my intentions during the 40 days of Lent this year was to set aside 30 minutes a day (on most days, not all) for a 30-day yoga practice. And I completed it! The series focused on breath, which was perfect for connecting me with God and with my body.

What have you been up to this month? What are you looking forward to in the next month? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Here’s Our April One Word Linkup: 3 Things to Do With Your One Word of the Year
—One Word Linkup

By LisaNotes April 22, 2022 One Word Community 16 Comments

Share Your One Word Update

Link your blog post below about your One Word and share an update about your One Word in the comments.

3 Things to Do with Your One Word of the Year

1. TALK TO SOMEONE

Start a conversation with somebody about your word. See what it means to them. Ask how it works in their life. Share your own thoughts with them.

2. LOOK AT ITS OPPOSITE

Sometimes knowing what our word does NOT mean can help us understand what it does mean. Look up the antonyms of your word this month. Get any insights?

3. SHARE YOUR ART

If you created any artwork or graphics from our 40-day Lent challenge (or anytime), share them with someone in person or with us online. Add them to the linkup below, or in our Facebook group, or tag us on Instagram @onewordcommunity. We want to see!

Thanks again to Lisa Hite for sharing her with us. She gave us lots of fun ideas to participate with our words!

This One Word linkup will remain open through Saturday night, April 30.

The next One Word linkup will begin Sunday, May 22 (every One Word linkup in 2022 opens on the 22nd).

Leave a comment here about your One Word.

Get more One Word ideas here

Link Up About Your One Word!

When the Children Go Hide

By LisaNotes April 20, 2022 My stories 12 Comments

Jeff and I are sitting on the top row of the first set of seats, sunken right below the main lobby and walkway at the newly renovated Legacy Arena in Birmingham. We’ve been watching the Alabama High School Basketball State Finals on this March weekend.

This Saturday afternoon we’re watching the boys and girls finals for each region. The games have been nail-biters. We’ve been amply entertained.

Until the already noisy arena becomes much noisier. But it’s not from the basketball game.

It’s from the hallway right behind us. There’s a flurry of activity.

We see the crowd gathering. We hear the teenagers yelling. We overhear rumors there’s a fight.

But then we see something very different.

Across the arena in the student sections, we see crowds of teenage spectators suddenly running frantically down the steps of the arena, climbing over the rails, to escape to the nearest exits.

And the students left behind who haven’t evacuated?

They’re hiding. We see them crouching as low as they can get under their stadium seats.

What is happening here?

And what are Jeff and I supposed to be doing???

We aren’t sure.

We don’t want to go up into the hallway. That’s where the ruckus is. We don’t want to go down into the basement. We have no idea what’s happening there either.

So we wait.

Surely the announcers will give directions soon. But they’ve either disappeared off the court or are hiding under tables courtside on the arena floor.

My heart is pounding. My thumbs are scrolling through Twitter. Sometimes it’s quicker to get news from social media than in person.

I start gathering my belongings into my clear plastic bag, the one that was inspected for illegal weapons when we entered the arena at 9:00 this morning. I want to be ready to dart out in a hurry, if we decide it’s needed.

Early reports from social media and the hype in the arena are now coming in. Some say they saw an arm in the air with a gun. Some say they heard the words, “Gun! Gun! He’s got a gun!” Some say they heard POP POP POP.

At last, an announcer returns to the arena microphone. He tells us to remain in our seats. He tells us we are safe. He tells us no shots have been fired.

The game will resume shortly.

The students crawl out from under their seats.

False alarm or not, knowing how to protect themselves in these scenarios are what these students have trained for.

The students have been taught how to respond to an active shooter situation.

I don’t know if I should be glad.

Or devastated.

We never heard for sure if shots were actually fired that afternoon in the Birmingham arena. There were no reported injuries anyway. My heart breaks for those in other places who’ve had very different outcomes in their schools, their shopping centers, their movie theaters, etc. Lord, have mercy.

Share your thoughts in the comments.