“Mindfulness gives you time. Time gives you choices. Choices, skillfully made, lead to freedom.”
– Bhante H Gunaratana
I’m at home in front of my laptop, looking at my schedule for the day. I hear the ping of a text. It is Jeff. He is at the grocery store buying groceries; would I like chicken for lunch and do we need lettuce?
Yes, please. And yes again.
One less meal to cook is always a pleasure to me. It gives me time to do other things. (Plus, Jeff is a wonderful and eager cook.)
I cross off “prepare lunch” from my list and immediately fill the slot with other things.
My phone pings again. Another text. This one from a friend I haven’t seen in ages. She has a rare opening in her schedule in an hour. It’s short notice, she says, but am I free for lunch?
I apologize and say no but thanks. I ask how she’s doing. So very busy, she says.
“There are hundreds of words we could use to describe our feelings, but most of us use one or two: ‘fine’ or ‘busy.'”
– Marc Brackett
Most everybody says a version of it. “I’m so busy.” “I’m too busy.” “Life is so busy.”
I’ve grown to despise the word busy. I cringe when I hear it. I try to avoid using it myself, even when it’s accurate.
There’s nothing wrong with being busy, of course. Many people are legitimately busy. They have no time for one more thing because life is coming at them hard. It’s all they can do to keep up.
But for the rest of us, some of our busyness, at least, is a choice of priorities.
I know. I often feel overwhelmed even by my at-home busyness choices. I have my fingers in a lot of pies, projects that I value, things I want to do.
But when they leave me feeling scattered and too depleted for the things that matter most to me, something is amiss.
I pause to ask myself:
- What are my values?
- What is most important?
- Am I too busy, or is this just not my priority?
My ultimate goal is to prioritize people above projects (although the two often overlap).
But I fail at it again and again.
Years ago I remember Teresa, an acquaintance at church, toss out a casual comment about how she prioritized her time. It struck me as profound then. It continues to strike me as profound today. She said she had a hierarchy: family first, church second, work third.
I decided that day to determine my own hierarchy of priorities. If conflicts arose between time commitments, I wanted to choose immediate family first, extended family second, church family third, etc.
Decisions were easier to make with that rubric in place.
When we consciously prioritize who needs our presence the most (and the list may vary from season to season, depending on needs), and who we most need, our calendar will reflect it.
Presence takes time. Love can’t be rushed. John Mark Comer says, “There’s a reason people talk about ‘walking’ with God, not ‘running’ with God.”
If the greatest command is to love, we must slow down, give it time, as a priority.
As Laura Vanderkam says, “Time is finite, so we must make smart choices about it. But time is also abundant: there is enough for anything that truly matters.”
What truly matters today? Who truly matters today?
Presence is more important than productivity. Take ownership of your hours. They’ll pass just the same whether you use them foolishly or intentionally. And once they’re gone? You can’t get them back.
Time is too precious to leave to happenstance. Prioritize. Fill your hours with meaning, significance, and love.
Use your time on purpose.
Do you feel too busy? Share your thoughts in the comments.
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