Lisa notes

How to Mark the Moment {Series Intro #1}

“In life, we can work so hard to get the kinks out, we forget to put the peaks in.”
– Chip and Dan Heath

Things Change

When have you had a defining moment? A moment where everything changed? Either literally or mentally?

Often defining moments occur around peak milestones: graduations, weddings, baptisms.
They also occur around transitions: a new job, a cross-country move, an overseas mission trip.
And sometimes they involve a pit: a death, an injury, a divorce.

We are always in a season of change.

Whether we are young or old or in-between, life is never constant. Relationships change. Job and family responsibilities shift. Even our bodies never stay the same.

Sometimes we’re forewarned that a new season is approaching. Other times it whirls in like a tornado at our front door, unexpected and unannounced.

Underline the Moments

Regardless of how or why changes come, they sometimes require a mark.

“Moments matter. And what an opportunity we miss when we leave them to chance!”

The Hebrew people in the Old Testament often stopped to build an altar to remember a moment (Genesis 12:7; Genesis 28:18; Exodus 17:15; Joshua 4:5-7; Joshua 8:30; and more).

Sometimes we need to do the same, erecting our own stones of remembrance, underlining an experience, in whatever form that takes.

[See “Where’s My Ebenezer?” And read this beautiful post by Barbara at Stray Thoughts, “Here I Raise My Ebenezer.” It’s full of defining moments.]

The Power of Moments

For the next four Wednesdays, I’ll be sharing unique ways to mark a moment.

The four ideas will come from a fantastic new book by Chip and Dan Heath, The Power of Moments: Why Certain Experiences Have Extraordinary Impact.

The authors explain in the book how to capture your own peak moments through these four elements.

Moments of Elevation
are experiences that rise above the routine
Moments of Pride
commemorate people’s achievements
Moments of Insight
deliver realizations and transformations
Moments of Connection
bond us together

[For various reasons, the authors thought it too cheesy to use EPIC as an acronym for the four elements—they order it EIPC in the book—but EPIC is easier for me to remember.]

I highly recommend you get a copy of this book for yourself. You won’t regret it.

“Teachers can inspire, caregivers can comfort, service workers can delight, politicians can unite, and managers can motivate. All it takes is a bit of insight and forethought.”

Download Chapter 1 here.

Marking My Transition

Personally, my life is about to change. After 25 years of being married to Jeff, caring for our two daughters, opening the family to two son-in-laws, we’re about to add a new layer. Morgan will add a baby girl to our family in January.

I don’t know how to be a grandmother. But I know I want to be a good one.

So Jeff and I recently marked the moment of upcoming transition, asking for God’s help as we shift gears.

On our 25^th anniversary trip to Maine, we brought with us a group of rocks, marked with “Thanks,” “Help,” and “Wow.”

I’ll share what we did with the rocks in the upcoming posts, how we made a moment.

Quotes

But for now, I’ll share some quotes from The Power of Moments to inspire you to create your own moments.

As you read them, think of your own transitions. Are you in a season of change within your job, your family, school, church, health?

Why create a defining moment around your change? Chip and Dan Heath suggest these reasons:

To enrich your experience.
To connect with others.
To make memories.
To launch your life or your career or your team in a new direction.

All quotes below by Chip and Dan Heath.

~ * ~

“Defining moments shape our lives, but we don’t have to wait for them to happen. We can be the author of them.”

~ * ~

“Shouldn’t couples acknowledge and celebrate what they’ve accomplished together? One couple we know kept an anniversary journal for the first decade of their marriage. Every year they would record the things they accomplished: Redecorating the back bedroom, hosting extended family for Thanksgiving dinner, and so on.”

~ * ~

“Moments when we display courage make us proud. We never know when courage will be demanded, but we can practice to ensure we’re ready. The protesters involved in the Nashville lunch counter sit-ins didn’t just show courage, they rehearsed it.”

~ * ~

“Courage is contagious; our moments of action can be a defining moment for others.”

~ * ~

“Remote contact is perfectly suitable for day-to-day communication and collaboration. But a big moment needs to be shared in person. (No one dials in to a wedding or graduation, after all.) The presence of others turns abstract ideas into social reality.”

~ * ~

“Creating more memorable and meaningful experiences is a worthy goal—for your work, for the people you care about, and for you personally—independent of any secondary impacts.”

* * *

Join me next Wednesday, October 18, for how to create a defining moment with #1, Moments of Elevation.

“Moments of elevation are experiences that rise above the routine. They make us feel engaged, joyful, surprised, motivated. Research suggests that organizations dramatically under-invest in building peaks, choosing instead to fill potholes.”

What’s been a recent memorable moment in your life? Please share in the comments.

The Four (EPIC) Elements of Marking the Moment:

Just Say You’re Sorry

By LisaNotes October 9, 2017 Homeless, My stories, One Word 2017: Story 48 Comments

You need to know about Julie. I just met her Saturday. But I already want to be like her.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

First Meet Anna

I’ve never met Julie. I am outside meeting a different lady (I’ll call her Anna here). Anna is one of our guests at Outdoor Church. She looks disturbed.

I ask Anna if she’d gotten her meal. A free lunch is always served to our homeless friends when Outdoor Church finishes each first Saturday of the month at Manna House.

This month’s service and meal are being hosted by Julie’s church. They are grilling barbecue chicken to bless all who show up.

Anna tells me they were rude to her on the meal line. That they said she was a rule-breaker. And that she knows she is not a rule-breaker.

I believe Anna believes that.

But I believe differently.

I have seen how loving the people from Julie’s church have been. How gentle. How generous.

I tell Anna everything will be fine. We can go back in line. She is welcome to get a meal.

She is finally convinced. But only if I will come with her.

Now Meet Julie

In line, Julie and her friends offer Anna a plate, as I knew they would.

But Anna begins pointing at Julie. “It’s her! She thinks I’m a rule-breaker.”

I see the shocked look on Julie’s face. She is clueless.

Julie has no idea what is going on. She does not know why this woman is pointing a finger at her.

I try to smooth things over with Anna, convince her that it’s all a misunderstanding, that Julie isn’t mad at her.

But Anna won’t have it. She keeps pointing at Julie.

I don’t know what to do. I often don’t in these situations. I need more skills.

But I’m getting nowhere with Anna. So I go behind the line to meet Julie.

She doesn’t know me; I don’t know her.

I tell Julie, “I know you did nothing wrong. But will you tell this lady you don’t think she’s a rule-breaker? She has mental problems.”

Julie probably thinks I am the one with mental problems (and I admit, I have my days).

But she listens to me. Then she turns to Anna.

The Best Part

And this is what Julie says. (This is the best part of the story.)

Julie tells Anna, “I am so sorry. I was wrong. I would love to give you some food.”

Anna leans in. She mumbles something again about not being a rule-breaker.

And Julie repeats, looking Anna in the eye with humility and sincerity, “I don’t think that about you. I am the one who is wrong. I’m sorry.”

And Anna melts to her kindness.

Her belligerence fades. Her resistance disappears. She says, “Ok.” She takes a plate and is on her way.

Now I am the one who can’t let it go.

I go back to give Julie a hug. To thank her for what she just did. For her gracious apology to a stranger who had falsely accused her.

She shrugs it off. She laughs. She says she’s used to saying she’s sorry.

I can laugh, too. The drama is over. I tell Julie I want to be more like her. I mean it.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Just Say This

Life would be sweeter if we would say “I’m sorry” more often.

Even if we are not in the wrong, we can still be sorry. We can still apologize. We can still be humble.

When Julie said, “I’m sorry” to Anna, I saw Jesus in her.

I want to see more of Jesus in me.

Maybe I need to say “I’m sorry” more often, too.

* * *

When’s the last time you said, “I’m sorry”? Is it hard or easy for you? When has someone else’s apology changed a situation for you? Please share in the comments.

Hurricanes R Us – Adventures in Florida

By LisaNotes October 4, 2017 My stories, One Word 2017: Story 49 Comments

[if you can’t see the Wauchula video, click here]

{Sunday morning, September 10}

People in Wauchula, Florida, are waiting. They haven’t met Irma, but they know she is on the way.

In the next 24 hours, Irma will storm in, announced but uninvited. She will blow limbs off trees, throw debris into roofs, and soak Florida with more water than it can hold.

She will try to extinguish all light.

And temporarily, she will succeed.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

{Sunday morning, September 24}

Two weeks later.

It’s 5:30 a.m. It’s pitch black in Huntsville, Alabama.

One set of headlights made it here before us. We wait together in darkness for the rest of our team to gather.

We are strangers this morning. We’ve seen names on emails. But no one knows everyone. We wonder who we all are.

Almost 700 miles away, another small group of people are also wondering who we are.

In Wauchula, they are waiting to see if we’ll really show up tonight in our church van and flood trailer as we promised.

The people in Florida are tired. For two weeks they have been locals helping locals. But the needs exceed the hours.

It can wear a body out. And a soul.

Others in Wauchula are also wondering, but not about us. They don’t know we’re coming. Instead, they are thinking . . .

about the mold creeping up daily on their walls,
if their ceilings will pour water when it rains again,
where the money will come from to fix or replace what Irma took.

They don’t yet see the light. So they work and they wait in the dark.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

{Monday – Thursday, September 25-28}

We are in the heart of Wauchula.

Our PAR (Prepare and Respond) disaster relief team meets their Send Me Missions team.

Together we nail the classic blue tarps (or whatever is available) onto roofs. We listen to homeowners repeat their stories. We hand out Red Cross cleaning buckets and give out local help numbers and extend bottles of cold water from our coolers.

But we also want to hand out hope.

Hope that help is always on the way.
Hope that God never abandons anyone.
Hope that it will get better.

We all need that hope.

Whatever our storms, whether a leaky faucet or hurricane winds, hope revives our spirits when they begin to sink low. Hope lights up dark places.

And hope often arrives in a human body.

Unlike the ultimate Hope that arrived in the flesh 2,000 years ago, our arrival hasn’t been prophesied for centuries or greeted with the brightest angels singing our praise.

But each of us can embody the hope that breathes life into the fainting by simply showing up.

Our work in Florida may not look like much to the human eye.

We pitch water-logged mattresses into a garbage pile; we document tarped roofs that still need fixing; we cut half-down trees off of driveways.

Much work still needs to be done.

We must keep showing up wherever we are. To do things we’re good at. And to occasionally do things (like, stand on a roof or meet new people) that make us uncomfortable.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

{Friday, September 29}

All 11 of us have loaded our suitcases and are on the road by 7:05 a.m. We leave behind our new friends Jamie and Hank and Bill and Amy Jo and Pastor Jeff.

We don’t know when we will show up again in person in Wauchula.

But we can show up in our own towns . . . for our next-door neighbor who needs a wrench or a Walmart clerk who needs her story heard or a sick aunt who needs a hot meal.

God wants us to show up with hope. Wherever we travel. To whomever we meet.

We will continue carrying hope with us for the people of Wauchula as we pray, as we remember, as we tell.

We saw Jesus there. He had been there the whole time. He has declared us family. And so we are. We are strangers no more.

The van pulls into the parking lot late Friday night. We throw away empty water bottles and Pringles cans and used napkins from under the seats.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

{Now}

But we keep our hearts full.

Of new friends.
Of inspiring stories.
And of hope that can never be blown away.

Light always finds a crack to shine through.

It’s who God is.

And it’s what He wants us to do.

* * *

In 2011 we had our own natural disaster in a series of horrific tornadoes. Who showed up to help? Unbeknownst to us until last week, one of the groups were the good people of Wauchula, Florida. Isn’t that just like God?

More stories to come. My heart is still processing.

Who needs your hope this week? Where can you show up? Please leave your thoughts in the comments.

Links, Books, and Things I Love – October 2017

By LisaNotes October 2, 2017 Life updates, Links I like 29 Comments

Here are favorites from September and what I’m looking forward to in October. We share once a month at Leigh’s.

1 Second Everyday

[If you can’t see the 1 Second Everyday video, click here]

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Around the Web

• Pastor, Strive to Learn Their Names
by Benjamin Vrbicek at The Gospel Coalition
Not just for pastors. Why it’s good to learn names. And how to do it.

• Most Female and Male Occupations
by Nathan Yau

In 2015, the most female job was preschool and kindergarten teachers, and the most male was carpenters. See what has changed since 1950.

• Anxious for Nothing: An Interview with Max Lucado
by Jonathan Petersen
I tend to be anxious. “Max Lucado: Anxiety disorders in the United States are the number one mental health problem among women and are second only to alcohol and drug abuse among men. Some say the United States is now the most anxious nation in the world.”

• White Identity Politics and American Terrorism
by Kai Wright
“We cannot move forward until white citizens claim their history. . . . we will first have to back up and do the long-avoided, scary work of leading truthful conversations about racism.”

• Hurricane Stuff

How do palm trees survive hurricanes?
by Melissa Breyer
No other state gets hit by hurricanes as often as Florida
by Brandon Griggs, CNN
Donate to the One America Appeal
I love seeing the former Presidents of both parties come together for a common cause.

“Hurricanes Harvey, Irma and Maria have brought terrible devastation— but also brought out the best in humanity. As former Presidents, we wanted to come together to help our fellow citizens in Texas, Florida and the Caribbean as they recover and rebuild.”

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Books, Writing, and Podcasts

• It’s Okay to “Forget” What You Read
by Charles Chu
It’s impossible to remember everything we read. And neither is it necessary. This article made me feel better about all the things I forget I read.

• How to Write Persuasively
by Henneke
Although the article is actually entitled “How to Write a Persuasive Sales Page (Even If You Hate Selling)“, it’s just good writing techniques in general. Henneke’s writing tips are usually quite useful.

• Favorite Quick News Podcasts
For top headlines, USA Today’s 5 Things to Know tells the top 5 stories you need to know each morning. And for a little more detail, Up First from NPR reports on the top stories in about 10 minutes.

• 6 Books I Recommend
Here are 3 fiction and 3 non-fiction books I enjoyed this month, including Almost Sisters by Joshilyn Jackson and one of my new favorite books, The Power of Moments by Chip and Dan Heath.

~ * ~

• Five Good Books I’m Reading Now

The Four Tendencies
The Indispensable Personality Profiles that Reveal How to Make Your Life Easier (and Other People’s Lives Better, Too)
by Gretchen Rubin
Of Mess and Moxie
Wrangling Delight Out of This Wild and Glorious Life
by Jen Hatmaker
The Sacred Enneagram
Finding Your Unique Path to Spiritual Growth
by Christopher L. Heuertz
Before We Visit the Goddess
by Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni
Hunger
A Memoir of (My) Body
by Roxanne Gay

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Things I Love

• Daughter Time

I love spending time with my two daughters. And soon-to-be granddaughter in 2018! Morgan came up to see her cousin Lindsey’s sweet newborn and visit with extended family.

~ * ~

• A New Memory Verse Challenge

We’re spending 10 weeks in Deuteronomy 30, memorizing 10 verses. Doing it with the Do Not Depart #HideHisWord community makes it a little easier and a lot more meaningful. I benefit by hearing what God speaks through others as we go through these verses.

~ * ~

• 25 Year Anniversary and a Week in Maine

We’ve never been so far north. We spent a week in Maine at the beginning of the month to celebrate our anniversary. We absolutely loved it there. (But I would never survive their cold winters.)

We bought nothing, but enjoyed L.L.Bean’s flagship store in Freeport, Maine

~ * ~

West Quoddy Head, in Lubec, Maine, is the easternmost point of the contiguous United States

~ * ~

East Quoddy Lighthouse (also known as Head Harbour) on Campobello Island, New Brunswick, Canada

~ * ~

• No Lasting Damage – Instagram Proof

Kids don’t always like to see their parents showing affection. Our daughter Jenna posted this on Instagram for our anniversary. It made me glad to know my and Jeff’s years of PDA didn’t damage her. {smile}

~ * ~

• Hurricane Clean-Up

Jeff and I were blessed to spend last week in Wauchula, Florida, with our disaster response team PAR (Prepare and Respond). The community suffered much damage from Hurricane Irma on September 10 and subsequent flooding in the following days.

We met many wonderful people – those who fed us, who housed us, who allowed us to partner with them (Send Me Missions), and who let us tarp their roofs. We were honored to pass along the love of God to those who were tired and hurting.

I only helped on the roofs that weren’t too steep (I’m a scaredy-cat)

~ * ~

Our PAR team from Alabama (after a shower)

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

On the Blog

Put the Decision Behind You
Making one big decision can help us make smaller decisions with more confidence and speed.
What’s Your Personality Type?
Anne Bogel helps you find it. She summarizes 7 personality frameworks in Reading People.
When God Parts the Waters, Walk Across
Opportunities come to us in different ways. But if God parts the waters for you, walk across. Adventures in Bar Harbor, Maine.
Because He Can Do Anything
Because God can do anything, we don’t have to do everything.

* * *

What was one of your highlights from September? What are you looking forward to in October? I plan to stay home as much as possible. Please share in the comments.

previous Links and Books

On the Blog – September 2017

By LisaNotes September 30, 2017 Archives 1 Comment

Six Books I Recommend – September 2017 (9/24) – Recommended reading list from books I finished in September 2017
Put the Decision Behind You (9/18) – How do you make decisions? Sometimes making one big decision helps us make the smaller decisions with more confidence. We’re choosing to memorize again.
What’s Your Type? (9/13) – What’s your personality type? Anne Bogel helps you find it. She summarizes 7 personality frameworks in Reading People.
When God Parts the Waters, Walk Across (9/11) – Opportunities come to us in different ways. But if God parts the waters for you, walk across.
Focus on Good Sense First (9/7) – Seeking wisdom (which, personified, is Jesus himself) is the route to slowing our anger.
Because He Can Do Anything (9/5) – Because God can do anything, I don’t have to do everything.
Links, Books, and Things I Love – September 2017 (9/1) – Links and pictures of articles, books, and things I love for September 2017

Six Books I Recommend – September 2017

By LisaNotes September 24, 2017 Books I Recommend 15 Comments

Here are six books I recommend from what I read in September. Once a month we share our current reading lists at Jennifer’s.

Books I Recommend

Nonfiction

1. The Power of Moments
Why Certain Experiences Have Extraordinary Impact
by Chip and Dan Heath

Fantastic book. It will make my top 10 list of this year. It explains why certain brief experiences can change us, and how we can be more intentional about creating those peak moments. It’s written by the authors of Made to Stick, Switch, and Decisive. I love everything they write, this included.

2. Organizing Solutions for People with Attention Deficit Disorder
Tips and Tools to Help You Take Charge of Your Life and Get Organized
by Susan C. Pinsky

Don’t let the title fool you. This book is for anybody who wants to get better organized, not just those with ADHD. I consider myself fairly organized as is, but I learned more small things I can do that could make a big difference. Now to make time to do them.

3. Who Thought This Was a Good Idea?
And Other Questions You Should Have Answers to When You Work in the White House
by Alyssa Mastromonaco

I enjoy books that go behind the scenes. This one is written by the former deputy chief of staff to President Obama. She tells stories of her time in the West Wing, on Air Force One, and her many busy days in the White House. Very interesting.

Fiction

4. The Light Between Oceans
by M. L. Stedman

My neighbor Savannah recommended this one before we went to Maine because I told her we wanted to see lighthouses. Good choice! It’s the story of a young couple who become light keepers in Australia in the early 1900s. When the wife Isabel has trouble carrying a child, the plot takes a very interesting turn.

5. The Almost Sisters
by Joshilyn Jackson

I enjoyed this book set in Alabama. The heroine Leia Birch Briggs deals with an aging grandmother, racist neighbors, and her own dysfunctional family.

6. The Tiger’s Wife
by Téa Obreht

This one was a little strange, but interesting. The setting is a Balkan country after years of war. Natalia, a young doctor, walks through the years with her grandfather and circumstances back and forth in time.

Reading Now

The Four Tendencies
The Indispensable Personality Profiles that Reveal How to Make Your Life Easier (and Other People’s Lives Better, Too)
by Gretchen Rubin
How to Listen So People Will Talk
Build Stronger Communication and Deeper Connections
by Becky Harling
Before We Visit the Goddess
by Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni
Born a Crime
Stories from a South African Childhood
by Trevor Noah
Of Mess and Moxie
Wrangling Delight Out of This Wild and Glorious Life
by Jen Hatmaker
Hunger
A Memoir of (My) Body
by Roxanne Gay

* * *

What good book have you read lately? Please share in the comments.

My books on Goodreads
Previous reading lists