5 Links, Books, and Things I Love – January 2020

Every month I share my list of favorite 5’s.

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  • 5 interesting things online
  • 5 articles about words, books, or podcasts
  • 5 pictures of things I love
  • 5 things on the blog

What are you enjoying this month?

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5 Things Around the Web

The Original Article on Mister Rogers

Have you seen the movie “It’s a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood” with Tom Hanks as Mister Rogers? Please do! It’s so good. This is the original Esquire magazine article that the movie is based on.

White Fragility: Why It’s so Hard To Talk to White People About Racism

Thought-provoking. “Our socialization renders us racially illiterate. When you add a lack of humility to that illiteracy (because we don’t know what we don’t know), you get the break-down we so often see when trying to engage white people in meaningful conversations about race.”

Something This Protestant Learned from a Jew About Reading the Bible: A Story

We do well to listen to Jewish readers talk about the Bible. “I wonder how much else I think I know about the Bible might be less what I actually read in the Bible and more what I bring to it?”

6 Steps to a Safer Digital Life: Your 2020 Checklist

I’ve been working on #1 already. Cleaning up my digital clutter is harder than cleaning up my physical clutter.

Gregory Boyle’s Inspirational Speech about Gang Members

There is no us and them, just us. I love the work and the person of Gregory Boyle. His book, Tattoos on the Heart, hooked me a few years ago.

Gregory Boyle video

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5 Things with Words and Books

LSSU’s 45 Annual List of Banished Words

Did you notice any words overused, misused, or generally useless this past year? The list includes quid pro quo, living my best life, I mean, ….

How to Read More Books: Life Kit Podcast

Life Kit is a newish podcast to me that I love. This episode on how to read more books is a winner with all 3 tips.

5 Things to Help You Read More

And another “how to read more” list…this one has 5 things (#1 is the hardest for me, but I’m learning to do it).

How to Make Time to Read

Laura Vanderkam gets real. We have time to read, but are we reading what we want to? Some of it is our choice to make.

My Personal Favorite Books of 2019

It was hard narrowing down the list. But here are the favorite books I read in 2019: 10 nonfiction, 10 fiction, and 5 memoirs.

Top Books of 2019

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5 Pictures of Things I Love

Christmas Poses

Last month we took a lot of traditional family photos. I do not like getting my own picture made, but I love having photos of our family together.

Christmas poses

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Family Traditions

There are traditions I love doing either yearly (attending Christmas candlelight services together with Jenna and her in-laws) or at least every few years (The Nutcracker ballet).

Christmas Traditions

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Babies in Bassinet

Another Burgess family tradition is getting each newborn’s picture made in the family bassinet. My newest granddaughter and her cousin weren’t too excited about being put in there together, even for a few seconds.

babies in bassinet

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Play-Doh Play

Nobody loves Play-Doh more than our oldest granddaughter. I’ve learned that I love it now, too. I’m finally learning to create more than just snakes and balls.

Play-Doh

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I’m the Mom

This meme makes me laugh, because it’s true.

I'm the mom

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5 Things on the Blog

3 Steps to Choose “One Word” 

Have you picked one word for 2020? Here are 3 steps to help you choose a word right for you.

Should You Take This Personally? 

I hear her screaming at me. “I know you’re not sorry!” Should I take this personally?

Find Hope in the Darkest Day of the Year, Or, Why I Love Winter Solstice

Winter is my least favorite season. But after the darkest day of the year comes a brighter one.

9 Reasons to Keep Hope Alive No Matter What 

Hope works. Even when it doesn’t come naturally, we can choose hope. Here are 9 reasons to keep hoping, regardless of your circumstances.

How I Read and 2020 Reading Challenges

This is how I read. I hope to read as much in 2020 as I did in 2019, which is mainly in snatches of time here and there. Here is a list of 2020 Reading Challenges I am participating in. It’s not too late to join, if any interest you.

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What was a highlight from your December? What are you looking forward to in January and 2020? Please share in the comments.

previous Links and Books


Bless Others through Your Brokenness

Blessed Broken Given review

We all know what it means to take a loaf of bread, break off a piece, hand it to a friend.

Glenn Packiam shows us what a sacred act it is in his book, Blessed Broken Given. As Jesus created holy moments with bread in his life on earth, we discover through Packiam that we can do the same thing.

“There is more to this life than what you see. There is more to you than what you see. Nothing in this world is as common as it seems. Even bread is really more than bread.”

This book breaks down each word, Blessed – Broken – Given, and gives examples from Jesus’s life in the New Testament and provokes thoughts for our own ways to live out these concepts.

“Bread in the hands of Jesus is blessed, broken, and given. And so it is with you. Your life, as common and ordinary as bread, in Jesus’s hands becomes something more.”

It is okay to not be okay.

“Let your brokenness open you up. To the light. To love. To the grace of God.”

It’s not difficult to show your scars; it’s much harder to reveal your wounds. To let others into your pain in real time, to allow them to see that tender place of brokenness, to allow them to hear your questions, your off-the-cuff reflections, your in-the-moment vows—that is hard to do.”

But we don’t have to do it alone. We have a High Priest who goes with us.

He gives us a holy imagination. “Begin to see all God’s gifts and handiwork as icons of His glory and grace.”

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How will God use your brokenness to bless others in 2020? How can you share with others what God has given to you? Please share in the comments.

My thanks to Net Galley & WaterBrook Multnomah
for the review copy of this book


On the Blog – December 2019

Here are brief summaries and links to blog posts from December 2019.

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How I Read and 2020 Reading Challenges

In snatches of time between here and there, I read. Five minutes here, ten minutes there. Weeks go by and books get finished.

I don’t keep a standard to-be-read list.

Rather, I get samples of books I’m interested in sent to my Kindle from Amazon. I currently have 343 books (too many!) in my Samples folder (I create my own folders on my Kindle). These book suggestions come from other bloggers, podcasts, library shelves, friends, other books, etc.

After reading the sample, I decide if I want to read the full book. If I don’t, I remove the sample altogether.

But if the book does make the cut, I move it from my Samples folder to one of these folders:

  • My Borrow These folder (206 books, groan!)
  • Or, if I really like it and can’t find it at the library or on NetGalley, to my Buy These folder (47 books, and let’s be real, I’ll only buy maybe 5 a year).

When I’m ready for a new book, I look to those two folders on my Kindle to choose from. 

Occasionally someone will loan me a book or I’ll get a pre-published book to review on my blog or I’ll pick something off the “New” shelf at the library.

Sometimes they’re a dud. Sometimes they’re fascinating. And occasionally they’re life-changing.

So I’ll keep reading when I wake up too early in the morning or when I can’t sleep at night or as I’m folding towels at home or waiting in line at Walmart.

Almost every day I read. Definitely every week.

Reading books make me happy.

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2020 Reading Challenges

This year I’m returning to reading challenges.

  • They’re fun.
  • They provide camaraderie among readers.
  • They push me to expand my reading selections.

Here are the 2020 challenges I’m participating in. With each, you choose the books you want to read in each category. And you choose your preferred level of participation.

You can also include the same book in multiple challenges (crossovers are usually encouraged). Books can overlap.

Most have a monthly or quarterly linkup if you want to add your book reviews and see what others have been reading.

You can also set your own goals and/or create your own shelf on Goodreads, or join several of these challenges on Goodreads or Facebook.

Look into one or more of these challenges for yourself if you’re interested. We can read together.

For the Love of Ebooks Reading Challenge

Details: Any number of ebooks from any source, any genre
My Goal: Pro Status, 20-29 ebooks
Host: As Told by Tina

The 2020 Reading Challenge

Details: 12 books total over 10 categories (such as, a book by a local author, a re-read, a classic you didn’t read in school, …)
My Goal: 12 books
Host: Modern Mrs. Darcy

Library Love Challenge

Details: Any 12+ books from the library
My Goal: Thrifty Reader, 24 library books
Hosts: Angel’s Guilty Pleasures and Books of My Heart

NetGalley/Edelweiss Reading Challenge

Details: Any book from NetGalley or Edelweiss
My Goal: Bronze, 10 books
Host: Reading Between the Pages

New Release Challenge

Details: Books released/reviewed in 2020, minimum 100 pages per book
My Goal: New Release Newbie, 1-30 books
Hosts: Linda and Brandee

Nonfiction Reader Challenge

Details: 1 book each from 12 given categories (such as memoir, disaster event, psychology, …)
My Goal: 12 books
Host: Shelley Rae at Book’d Out

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I don’t always set reading goals. Do you? How many books do you want to read in 2020? Please share your thoughts in the comments.

Here are my favorite books from 2019.


Top Books I Recommend of 2019

My favorite book recommendations of 2019 are here. I tried to give you only 10 books.

But it couldn’t be done.

Instead, I divided my favorite books into three categories below:

  • 10 Nonfiction
  • 5 Memoir
  • 10 Fiction

Most were published within the past five years.

Did you read any of these? What did you think? What was your favorite book this year? Please share in the comments.

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Top 10 Nonfiction Books

1. Atomic Habits
An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones

by James Clear

Atomic Habits

If you want to keep good habits, this is a must-read. This book lives up to all its hype (which is a lot). [My 1-minute video review of Atomic Habits is here.]

2. Never Split the Difference
Negotiating as If Your Life Depended on It

by Chris Voss

Never Split the Difference

Author Chris Voss is a former hostage negotiator for the FBI. He uses his experience (such fascinating stories!) to explain nine strategies to make our lives better (not just for negotiations, but for relationships). So good!

3. Off the Clock
Feel Less Busy While Getting More Done
by Laura Vanderkam

Off the Clock

This book is a game-changer on how you use time and how you see time. It helps you see mistakes you make with time and how to correct them. [My 1-minute video review of Off the Clock is here.]

Related . . . 168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think also by Laura Vanderkam

4. Happy Money
The Science of Smarter Spending
by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton

Happy Money

Another fascinating book, this one suggests how to use your money to be happier in the long run. In a nutshell:

  1. Buy experiences.
  2. Make it a treat.
  3. Buy time.
  4. Pay now, consume later.
  5. Invest in others.

5. Dreyer’s English
An Utterly Correct Guide to Clarity and Style
by Benjamin Dreyer

Dreyer's English

Maybe an odd choice for a top 10 list, but this book about English is that good.  Regardless of what you write, this book is a wonderful resource. Plus it’s entertaining. 

6. Enlightenment Now
The Case for Reason, Science, Humanism, and Progress
by Steven Pinker

Enlightenment Now

A data-filled book, this one shows us through facts, charts, and graphs that, overall, the world is getting better, not worse.

7. Women Rowing North
Navigating Life’s Currents and Flourishing As We Age
by Mary Pipher

Women Rowing North

I took so many notes from this book, a sure sign of a great book. It gives me much-needed hope about getting older. 

8. Everybody Lies
Big Data, New Data, and What the Internet Can Tell Us About Who We Really Are
by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz

Everybody Lies

So intriguing! This book is full of interesting tidbits of information. It’s been called Freakonomics on steroids. [My 1-minute video review of Everybody Lies is here.]

9. The Myth of a Christian Nation
How the Quest for Political Power Is Destroying the Church
by Gregory A. Boyd

Myth of a Christian Nation

Although published in 2005, this book is a timely wake-up call to the church today. It urges us to rein in our hunger for political power and instead do the things Christ would do. [My 1-minute video review of The Myth of a Christian Nation is here.]

10. How the Bible Actually Works
In Which I Explain How An Ancient, Ambiguous, and Diverse Book Leads Us to Wisdom Rather Than Answers—and Why That’s Great News
by Peter Enns

How the Bible Actually Works

Here is a different perspective on how to read our Bibles. Sometimes the Bible gets a bad reputation simply because we expect things from it that God might not have intended it to deliver.

Related . . . The Bible Tells Me So: Why Defending Scripture Has Made Us Unable to Read It by Peter Enn


Top 5 Memoirs

1. Becoming
by Michelle Obama

Becoming

Michelle Obama restores my hope; politicians and families can be moral, kind, and likable. She is really honest in this book, both about her years before Barack and about her years in the White House. 

2. What Is a Girl Worth?
My Story of Breaking the Silence and Exposing the Truth about Larry Nassar and USA Gymnastics
by Rachael Denhollander

What Is a Girl Worth

This is a tragic story about systemic sexual abuse. But thanks to the courage of Rachael Denhollander and others, standing up for justice and doing the right thing wins out. 

3. The Moment of Lift
How Empowering Women Changes the World
by Melinda Gates

The Moment of Lift

Melinda Gates (Bill’s wife) is a stellar example of using money and power for good in our world.

4. Born to Run
by Bruce Springsteen

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I didn’t expect to enjoy this so much; Bruce Springsteen is an authentic storyteller. (I listened to him read the audio version; excellent!)

5. Maid
Hard Work, Low Pay, and a Mother’s Will to Survive
by Stephanie Land

Maid

I wish this weren’t a true story because it is a difficult journey for a single mom in America. Even if we aren’t in these shoes ourselves, we know someone who is. A great read.


Top 10 Fiction Books

1. The Nickel Boys
by Colson Whitehead

The Nickel Boys

Loosely basing this story on a real detention center for young boys in Florida, Colson Whitehead writes grippingly from beginning to end about a young African-American boy’s journey through life. [My 1-minute video review of The Nickel Boys is here.]

2. Before We Were Yours
by Lisa Wingate

Before We Were Yours

Revolving around a real-life scandal of a Memphis adoption agency, this novel tells about five siblings living in a shanty boat in Memphis in 1939, and then a present-day family with a yet-to-be discovered past. 

3. Where the Crawdads Sing
by Delia Owens

Where the Crawdads Sing

Kya Clark, the “Marsh Girl,” lives basically alone on the North Carolina coast. When a local boy is found dead in 1969, fingers point to her.

4. Washington Black
by Esi Edugyan

Washington Black

Prepare for a lot of hard and tender stops on this journey with Washington Black, an 11-year-old slave on a sugar plantation in Barbados. His life takes a big turn when he meets the master’s brother, Titch, an inventor and abolitionist.

5. The Alice Network
by Kate Quinn

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Two stories intertwine in this historical novel about a female spy in France during World War I and an American girl looking for her cousin after World War II. Each story masterfully unfolds just when you need it too. 

6. The Great Alone
by Kristin Hannah

The Great Alone

When her Vietnam veteran father decides to move the family to Alaska in 1974, teenage Leni isn’t thrilled about it. But there is far more at stake under the surface.

7. I Let You Go
by Clara Mackintosh

I Let You Go

The most shocking plot twist I read all year was in this book about five-year-old Jacob who is killed in a hit-and-run accident. And the mystery that follows.

8. The Death of Mrs. Westaway
by Ruth Ware

Death of Mrs Westaway

Hal, a poor woman in England, receives a mysterious letter saying she has inherited money from her recently-deceased grandmother. Hal, knowing she’s the wrong recipient, shows up to get the money anyway. 

9. Big Little Lies
by Liane Moriarty

Big Little Lies

Madeline, Celeste, and Jane are three mothers of kindergarten students at a school in Australia. Their interactions are entertaining and light-hearted much of the time, but serious and mysterious at other times.

10. A Place for Us
by Fatima Farheen Mirza

A Place for Us

Centered around a wedding of an Indian couple in America, this is a sweet story of hardships and struggles in a family as they interact with each other and the broader community as Muslims in the United States.


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What’s one of your favorite (or least favorite) books from 2019? Please share in the comments.

I’m looking forward to being a discussion dabbler in the 2020 Book Blog Discussion Challenge here and here. Join in to talk more about books in 2020.

2020-Discussion-Challenge

sharing with Modern Mrs. Darcy


Should You Take This Personally?

Proof of Children

I’ve already been at it awhile, asking to see ID cards. These moms, dads, and grandparents are waiting in line to get free Christmas gifts to give their kids. We need proof they are indeed the caregivers.

Almost everyone is gracious with our requests. They pull out Medicaid cards for their children or birth certificates or social security cards.

But occasionally someone argues with us. They say they didn’t know the requirements or they don’t have the cards with them or they can’t show us anything until next week.

We allow exceptions with permission; we give grace when we can.

The next young woman in line steps up to me. I get a bad feeling.

Are You Really Sorry?

I notice her stance before I hear her words. She is weaving back and forth, unsteady on her feet.

I ask for her children’s ID. She says she doesn’t have anything. I ask if she can come back Monday with proof. We’re giving away gifts then, too.

But she is furious with me. She says the cards are in storage. She doesn’t have the money to get them out.

I tell her I’m sorry, but we need to see some kind of paperwork.

I’m not ready for her reply.

She explodes: “Don’t tell me you’re sorry! You’re NOT sorry!”

I’m shocked. Instinctively, I say it again, “I really AM sorry….”

But I get no further because she’s screaming at me again. “I don’t want to hear that crap from you that you’re sorry! I know you don’t mean it!!!”

And I almost say it again. Because really I am sorry. I feel bad we can’t help her.

But I pull back. It won’t help to repeat it. She’s not hearing. And likely it would make things even worse.

I say nothing. I watch as she quickly staggers away from the crowd.

Feel Bad for Who?

I am stunned.

The people who had been near her in line tell me she was high. They say they feel bad for her children.

I feel bad for her children, too. Wherever they are. Somewhere safe, I pray. With someone safe.

But I also feel bad for me. I was just trying to help. I didn’t deserve that treatment.

The church lady in me rares up. I’d like to tell the woman that I don’t have to be here at all. I’m not getting paid. It’s freezing cold. I’m sacrificing my time and energy for people like her that I don’t even know.

She was ugly to me. Now I’m being ugly to her, if only in my mind.

Neither of us are right. We both are guilty.

I finally bounce back from my stupor, my anger, my offendedness. I feel less sorry for me. And more badly for her.

Because her attitude wasn’t about me.

I don’t need to take it personally.

Designed for More

Whoever I just saw, this wasn’t her true self.

In her original design, she was called forth to be loved, to have purpose, to live a life of value. Like each of us are.

But along the way, bad things must have happened. Then more bad things. And more.

And now here she is, not living out who she was made to be.

We all make wrong turns in life. Sometimes from our ignorance. Sometimes from our own willfulness. And sometimes because we’re knocked sideways so often that we lose sight of the path altogether.

I repent of my bad attitude. I pray for more compassion. I pray this young woman will find her way again. For herself. For her kids.

And I even pray for the people she randomly insults along the way. . . who, for the record, should not take it personally, even though we sometimes do.

But instead, we should take it prayerfully.

Sometimes I do, but not often enough, and not always as my first instinct.

Take This Personally

The night wears on. The line only continues to grow.

We finally have to call it, to issue rain checks for those who won’t reach the door tonight. They receive numbers to come back Saturday morning as first priorities.

As I start walking to my car, I see a smiling face look at me. It’s another woman who had previously been in line, a small woman with a child almost as tall as her.

She stops me to say thank you. She tells me she appreciates the smile on my face. She wants me to have a Merry Christmas. What a welcome contrast to the first woman.

The church lady in me again rises up. I want this to be about me, about my goodness, about my sacrifice.

But again, it’s not about me.

I can’t take this personally either.

If I didn’t earn the earlier criticism, I can’t take credit for this current praise.

Because neither is about me. Not really. It’s about life, about love, about heartaches and joys. About ups and downs and plenty and lack.

Ultimately, it’s about God.

  • His mission for justice.
  • His implanting of love.
  • His invitation to light up the world through the humility of his Son.

We’re all in the same human family, fathered by the same divine being.

And we all need his mercy equally. Some for addictions. Some for pride. Everybody for something.

The gift of grace. I need all God has to offer. I have no ID card to prove I qualify for it. . . Except this: God calls me his child.

I shouldn’t take everything personally. Except grace.

I can take grace very personally.

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Some things we should take personally. Like this.

And some things we should not. Like this.

How do you decide? Please share in the comments.