Bright-Sided {A Book a Day 16}
Do you see the glass half-full or half-empty?
I can’t vouch for other countries, but in the U.S., our culture tends to celebrate the half-full crowd and feel sorry for the half-empty folks.
But is there a downside to always thinking positively?
In this intriguing book, Bright-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America, the late Barbara Ehrenreich (she recently died from a stroke in September 2022) writes that positive thinking is a “mass delusion” that we need to recover from.
When Ehrenreich was diagnosed with breast cancer, she was immediately plunged into the world of positive thinking. She was told by some that cancer isn’t a problem at all, but “a gift, deserving of the most heartfelt gratitude.” She said it was enough to make you “want to go out and get an injection of live cancer cells.”
But while having a cheery attitude might make you easier to be around (maybe?), this sugar-coating of real-life problems such as cancer can be dangerous.
- Constant positivity can cause us to deny reality, preventing us from taking action when it’s needed.
- It can cause us to squash other genuine emotions, such as anger and frustration.
- It can cause us to blame ourselves (or our faith or our God) for not being positive enough if the healing doesn’t occur (in which case you are encouraged to think even more positively).
According to Ehrenreich, “The failure to think positively can weigh on a cancer patient like a second disease.”
This book is about more than just cancer diagnoses though.
Ehrenreich walks you through many ways that positive thinking is becoming an obligation we impose on each other.
But is the antidote to embrace despair instead? No. Ehrenreich says,
“In fact, negative thinking can be just as delusional as the positive kind.”
The sweet spot? Ehrenreich doesn’t clearly define one. But she does strongly suggest that instead of acquiring only the skills of positive thinking, we should be highlighting the skills of critical thinking. Raise better questions, even if they’re uncomfortable.
But the book isn’t a downer.
Actually it might help you feel better.
3 Excerpts from Bright-Sided
“Breast cancer, I can now report, did not make me prettier or stronger, more feminine or spiritual. What it gave me, if you want to call this a ‘gift,’ was a very personal, agonizing encounter with an ideological force in American culture that I had not been aware of before—one that encourages us to deny reality, submit cheerfully to misfortune, and blame only ourselves for our fate.”
~ * ~
“Sometimes we need to heed our fears and negative thoughts, and at all times we need to be alert to the world outside ourselves, even when that includes absorbing bad news and entertaining the views of ‘negative’ people.”
~ * ~
“We cannot levitate ourselves into that blessed condition by wishing it. We need to brace ourselves for a struggle against terrifying obstacles, both of our own making and imposed by the natural world. And the first step is to recover from the mass delusion that is positive thinking.”
Are you a half-full or half-empty type? Share your thoughts.
You are on Day #16 of the series, A Book a Day {Nonfiction Favorites}.
Each day of February 2023 I’m recommending one book a day from favorite nonfiction books I’ve recently read.
The Table of Contents for all 28 books is here, updated daily.
Previous:
“No Time Like the Present” {Book 15}
Next:
“The Book of Joy” {Book 17}
This sounds like a need to read book. We need to live positively with hope. But yes, we must face the truths of life and deal with them.
I’ve always been frustrated by the glass half full or empty scenario. I think, “Just drink what’s in it already.” Maybe I’m a realist?
I’m so thankful for the psalms as examples of honest lament before God. He knows the depths of our feelings and doesn’t expect us to falsely mask them.
Years ago I was on an email subscriber list for patients and caregivers with a certain disease. I felt that to be a good “testimony,” I needed to always put a positive spin on things. But another Christian came on the list who acknowledged her pain and problems, but still showed her hope in Christ through them. I realized that always acting positive wasn’t authentic. Acting like I didn’t have any problems, or that I always had victory over them, didn’t invite anyone into sharing their hearts.
I like that the author brings the balance of the other side, that negative thinking can be a problem as well. If we always see the down side or wallow in it, we’re creating a different kind of false view.
This sounds like a very good and much needed book. Being able to see the good in hard things is a very helpful skill, but we do have to face the fact that things are HARD and have an accurate judgment of what hurts and what we need.
I’m a very positive, half-full glass, kind of girl. But I can see the value of acknowledging pain and difficulty. I want to live a Romans 8:28 life, believing in the end God will work it for my good.
But in saying this, I do realize I might get on people’s nerves! I might should read this book. 🙂
I tend to half full but often fall into half empty. What an interesting twist to the positive moment though and very thoughtful too. Raises my compassion and awareness of what I say.
No one has really ever accused me of being a grand optimist. I’d like to think I am a realist. I get very frustrated when the world feels like it is coming to an end and my husband casually remarks that it will all be ok. Maybe it will. But sometimes I need a little more support and sympathy than that off-the-cuff comment. Going to check out this book.
This is such an important book and I’m glad it’s being shared here. I didn’t realised she’d passed, though – that’s a real shame. She wrote some really good and interesting stuff and was never shy of saying it how it is.