Overlapping Moments: Find Life’s Magic in Shared Time
The Weight of Untold Stories
I sit on the edge of my chair in the hospital room. My uncle is telling a story from his hospital bed. I had asked him about the animals he and my dad had as they grew up in rural Mississippi in the first half of the 1900s. I’m collecting his memories about their chickens, mules, and pigs, incorporating his stories into my own.
These are stories I’ve not heard before. And they are stories that will be gone when I lose my last remaining uncle. So I listen attentively, realizing the weight of each tale he tells.
I don’t know as much as I would like to know about his and my parents’ early years. And he won’t live long enough to know about my latter years.
The Gift of Stories
Back home, I find a new email in my inbox from Storyworth. It’s a new writing prompt for the week: “What is one of your favorite memories of your mother?” My mind flips through my memories of experiences with my sweet mama.
For 52 weeks this year, Storyworth is prompting me to write a story about my life. My youngest daughter, Jenna, bought the year-long subscription for me as a Christmas present last December. At the end of this year, Storyworth will compile all my stories into a book. This is my opportunity to tell her, and whoever else might later read the book, about my life even after I’m gone.
My daughter doesn’t know a lot about my early years. I won’t live long enough to know about her latter years.
But we overlap in the middle.
The Overlapping Middle
I don’t like watching people die even though I know we all are dying. Watching someone lose words and become dependent is uncomfortable. Watching new life, on the other hand, is easier and more exciting. Seeing my grandson learn new words and gain independence is satisfying.
But both experiences are natural and valuable.
Living in the center of the Venn diagram of overlapping lives is the juicy stuff. It’s what we need to feast on. It’s the only solid food we have anyway. Everything else is imaginative.
Connecting Across Generations
While we are here, we each want to be seen, known, and understood. We long for our life to be witnessed by a fellow human being—not to be judged or evaluated. But to be noticed.
Be curious about the person beside you in time. And satisfy their curiosity about you. These connections we make are the strings that keep us from falling apart when life gets bumpy and we feel we can’t keep it together.
These intersecting points between us are the magic of life. They are what make it matter. They are what bring us meaning.
Death isn’t the enemy. More time isn’t necessarily better. The quality of our time together is more valuable than the quantity. How can we more fully live today, fully loving those around us?
I’m grateful for these overlaps in time with those around me. In these moments, we find the true essence of life—the connections we make, the stories we share, and the love we give and receive.
Cherish the overlaps; they are the threads that weave the fabric of our lives.
Share your thoughts in the comments.
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Oh, how this made me miss my parents and their generation, Lisa! I’m reminded of the Joni Mitchell lyrics: “You don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone.” You’ve inspired me to write down things about me that I want my grandchildren to remember once I’m no longer here to ask.
I love the thoughtfulness of your daughter, too, in giving you this writing tool for Christmas.
Blessings!
There are so many things I wish I had asked my parents and aunts and uncles before they were all gone. I have one uncle left, too, but he’s pretty active, traveling a lot, so we don’t see them often.
Storyworth sounds like such a good idea. I’ve written down some family history things, but want to do more. My kids aren’t so much interested in it now, but might be some day–or their kids might be.
Lisa, I am learning the value of this very thing through our son asking question after question when we visited him this summer. I had the privilege of growing up in a multi -generational home…three generations under one roof and I treasure the memories.
Lisa,
This is just so beautifully written and so very true. You truly have a way with words and this brought tears to my eyes. We do overlap….when we were young with our grandparents, our parents and many other older relatives…as we get older and lose those of the previous generations, we add more to overlap with…with our children, then our grandchildren and in no time we are that older generation. I love the Storyworth concept…I have been working on my own family history and with recent losses of that older generation in the last few years, I am feeling the pressure to hopefully write down and record some of those memories to share with those behind me. Thank you for this beautiful post.
I had a lump in my throat as I read, Lisa. I don’t want to waste the gift of overlapping with so many dear ones.
Great post Lisa! As you know I’ve not long lost my Dad but in the few years leading up to his passing I asked many questions about his early life I hadn’t known.
I have one remaining Aunt on Dad’s side so we are asking her questions to fill in the gaps. ????
blessings, Jennifer
Lisa, beautifully written. This post gave me much to think about. Thank you for sharing with us at The Crazy Little Lovebirds link party #51.
I loved Storyworth. After my first year, I purchased a second year and printed the book after two full years of collecting stories. Didn’t regret it at all collecting two years of memories. It was a great practice to do.
forgot to add: don’t forget to add photos. I wish now I had added more.
This…”The quality of our time together is more valuable than the quantity.”…is pure gold!
A couple of years ago, I had to do a family history project for school. I learned so much from living relatives about the things that shaped all of our lives
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