The Beautiful Ones

They used to be beautiful. I had purple ones, pink ones, lavender ones.

I felt proud. I could grow African violets. I knew how to make them bloom.

Until I moved.

My beautiful African violets, once full of colorful flowers, are now barren, nothing but green stems and leaves.

The flowers never came again.

This is where I am now.

It’s All About the Light

Now I know it wasn’t me at all that made the flowers bloom. I can take no credit.

It was all about the light. I once had it. Now I don’t.

As I finish memorizing 1 John 1 this week, I’m reminded how much I’m like the African violets.

I can’t take credit for making flowers bloom in my own life either. It’s all about the light instead.

If I want to produce fruit in my life—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control—then I need help beyond my own abilities.

I need less shade, more Light.

Reliable Light

Staying in the light doesn’t have to be difficult.

If I’ll stay honest with God, admitting to him when something is blocking the light, he will forgive me, clear away the shadows, cleaning me from everything I’ve done wrong (1 John 1:9).

9 God is faithful and reliable. If we confess our sins, he forgives them and cleanses us from everything we’ve done wrong.
10 If we say, “We have never sinned,” we turn God into a liar and his Word is not in us.
– 1 John 1

The true Light is faithful and reliable.

I’m going to move my African Violets to a different window this week. In their old spot, the leaves reproduce well, but they produce no flowers. But in a new spot, they should be able to do both.

I want more blooms, too. I want to stay positioned to soak in the light.

Thanks to God, I can.

Our candle giveaway winner for the 1 John 1 challenge is…Marilyn Saxon!!!

Are you a plant person? Do you have good lighting in your home? How do you stay in the light yourself? Share in the comments.

A Knock on the Door

It’s around 10:30 p.m. on the cruise ship. We’re somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean. I am too tired to stay up any longer.

I send Jeff out with our group of friends to go to the next show without me.

I’m in bed alone, lights out. I hear a knock on the door. I’d locked it earlier, but not bolted it. I want Jeff to be able to get back in when he returns.

Has Jeff forgotten his key?

I don’t want to get up unnecessarily, so I first try saying, “Come in.”

I hear the door open. But when it does, it’s not Jeff standing there.

It’s not anyone I know.

It’s a man in a uniform.

This Is Not Normal

The stranger steps inside my door, leaving it cracked. He tells me he’s with maintenance. He’s here to work on the door.

We actually had reported a problem with our door earlier that morning. It wasn’t locking well.

But what maintenance man comes calling at 10:30 p.m.???

I wasn’t dressed appropriately to get out of bed to show him the issue. And I was too shocked to say the most logical thing, “Please leave now. Come back tomorrow!”

So instead, he props open the door, just a sliver, and sits down quietly on the floor with his tool box.

And I lie in bed with HUGE prayers.

God, please, let this man be legit. Please make him leave. Please let Jeff come back NOW.

I feel completely vulnerable. My phone is out of reach. And even if I were to scream, who would hear me? My friends in the cabin room next door are out with Jeff.

The man seems nervous, too. He walks into the bathroom. He does something noisy with the trash can. Then he walks back to sit on the floor by the cracked door.

This is not normal.

But as long as I see the sliver of light shining into the room from the hallway, it means the door is still propped open. And it means I still have hope to avoid total darkness with this stranger, unprotected and all alone.

It seems like an hour passes.

But it’s probably only 10 minutes. The man is still sitting on the floor, thinking with his tools; I’m still frozen in bed, my heart racing, my mind spiraling.

I hear voices down the hall. It’s Jeff returning to the room, thank God!

He’s surprised to see this man here.

Jeff asks what he’s doing and immediately tells him to leave. The man mutters a quiet reply under his breath, quickly grabs his tools, and scurries down the hallway.

He’s gone.

That Sliver of Light

I’ve never felt such relief in my life. I’ve been rescued. The complete darkness never came. Not this time.

The next day we report the incident to our cabin steward. He is distressed. He knows nothing about a maintenance call nor who the employee could have been. He apologizes and promises it won’t happen again.

I’m still shaken for days afterward.

Perhaps the man had no nefarious motives. But this could have ended differently, especially in my imagination.

Yet instead of a disaster, I’d only had a scare.

I’m beyond grateful.

Thank you, God, for that sliver of light, for leaving the door cracked open, for always leaving space for hope.

I want to stay in your light forever.

Even though this took place five years ago, it still feels fresh.

Our memory verses in 1 John 1 this week are about admitting when we need help from God. When we each come clean with him, we stay in the light with each other.

When have you felt saved by the light? Share in the comments.

When It’s Too Light

I turn out the lights again in the guest bedroom. I’m testing it a third time.

Another failure.

There’s still too much light.

I want it dark. As dark as I can get it.

I’ve tried pulling the blinds lower, the curtains tighter. But light still makes it through.

I’ve already spent two nights in this beach condo waking up almost every hour, thinking it is morning because the light is streaming through the blinds so brightly.

But it isn’t the sun I am sensing. It is only the bright lightbulb in the hallway right outside my window, making my brain think it is morning.

I need the darkness so I can rest.

Hide in the Dark

Nothing is wrong with wanting it to be dark when we sleep.

But what about when we want to hide in the dark as a coverup in the day? When we don’t want others to know what we’re really thinking? What we’re really doing?

There are things we don’t want others to see.

• Our flaws
• Our resentments
• Our doubts
• Our anger
• Our greed
• Our failures
• Our laziness
• Our pride

To keep our false image alive, we think we need to keep the negatives hidden in the dark.

But no matter how dark we try to make it, we still can’t block out all the light.

Because light can’t be overcome by darkness.

God is pure light.

And God is everywhere.

Show Up in the Light

These week’s memory verses for me are 1 John 1:5-6:

5 This is the message we heard from Christ and are reporting to you: God is light, and there isn’t any darkness in him.
6 If we say, “We have a relationship with God” and yet live in the dark, we’re lying. We aren’t being truthful.

If I want the best relationship with God I can have, I need to be authentic. I need to show up in the light.

I can step into full light with God. I can be authentic with God because he knows all of me anyway. He loves all of me anyway.

A healthy relationship is a genuine relationship. I can have that with God. I can have that with others. I don’t have to hide behind toxic positivity or a flawless facade. 

On the third night at the condo, I find a set of extra sheets in the closet. I thread them over the top of the curtain rod. I tuck in the ends tight. I clothespin the edges of the curtains together. I stuff an extra towel at the base to create a seal. 

I flip the light switch to off.

Rest in the Light

In the end, it wasn’t really total darkness I was seeking: It was just rest.

I thought darkness would bring rest.

But it is God, the Light, who brings lasting rest.

Even now, I’m still tempted to slip in and out of dark coverups to find security when I feel vulnerable.

But extra sheeets over curtain rods doesn’t really do it. Instead, it’s in the light of God that I find the most acceptance. The most peace.

And the most rest.

On the third night, I sleep at last.

Share your thoughts in the comments.

And when you leave a comment here or in our Hide His Word Facebook group, you’ll be automatically entered in our Candle Giveaway!

Our fellow 1 John 1 participant Donna is graciously donating a candle made by Syrian women refugees to one lucky winner. Check out Mercy House Global for more on this ministry that Donna supports.

The giveaway closes on October 15. Winner will be announced October 17. Leave a comment here.

I used to be a morning person.

I’m not so sure anymore.

I still wake up early. But I don’t like getting up early, especially when the sun rises later and later as we move toward Dec 21, the shortest day of the year.

I need the light.

I have a morning routine once I’m up. I open all the blinds in the bedroom. Then I open the blinds in the office area, I open the blinds in the dining room, and I open up the front door.

I want all the sunshine I can get coming in.

I need the light.

I’m reading and memorizing these sayings from the apostle John this week:

“This is the life we have seen and heard. We are reporting about it to you also so that you, too, can have a relationship with us. Our relationship is with the Father and with his Son Jesus Christ.
We are writing this so that we can be completely filled with joy.”
1 John 1:3-4

The more light streaming into my life—the stronger my bond with the Father and Son—the more I see Christ in you. The more I can give you the benefit of the doubt. The more I can learn from you. The more I can love you.

And loving you brings me joy. And even more light.

I need the light.

Bright light also shows us each other’s imperfections. But even then, it’s helpful to see what’s real. We can help each other heal.

How do you let in the sunshine each day?

Share your thoughts in the comments.

We still have three more months.

I’m not one of those people who has their Christmas shopping done by September. Alas. I’d love to be.

But I’m never quite ready to think about it this early.

There’s an order to my Christmas shopping:

• identify who to buy for,
• determine what they’d like,
• buy the gift,
• wrap the gift, and
• give the gift.

I usually get hung up at step 2. It takes me until December to get over the hump enough to move forward again.

Yet there’s something about Christmas I am ready for, at any time of the year. It’s a candlelight Christmas service at church. We attend one each December at a neighboring church as part of our annual Christmas tradition.

Lighting the candles is the most moving part for me.

There’s an order to it, too.

• First, we receive the unlit candles.
• Second, someone brings the fire, and lights his neighbor’s candle from his own.
• Third, that person passes the flame to their neighbor, who passes it to their neighbor, until it’s finally my turn too.
• And then I get to pass the flame to my neighbor.

In the end, we all have lit small candles with little flames, but it creates much light. We raise our candles high and climax in singing “Silent Night.”

It’s a beautiful process. It stirs my soul.

Jesus manifests himself to me in a similar order as well.

“This life was revealed to us. We have seen it, and we testify about it. We are reporting to you about this eternal life that was in the presence of the Father and was revealed to us.”
1 John 1:2

• First, Jesus reveals his love.
• I need to pay attention to see it.
• If so, I receive it.
• Then I have love to spread round to others.

In that order.

Granted, sometimes I get lazy and try to flip the order. I try to tell about something I know little about. Or show love before I’ve received love. Or I simply drop out after the first or second step, and never end up sharing this authentic life with another person.

So as I focus on 1 John 1:2 this week, I know Jesus will start the process by giving his love; I can count on that. My part is to notice how he becomes visible each day. In the seeing, I can then collect a bounty of love to share with someone else.

Just like the fire on the candles I light at Christmas, I want to feel the heat of Jesus’s presence. I want to smell the smoke. I want to notice the movement. I want to see by his light.

And then I want light up someone else with this love, too.

Share your thoughts in the comments.

Who can you share a light with this week? Get your candle lit, then pass it along. Share your thoughts in the comments.

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She’s Here!

It’s a Wednesday in October 2019. Cheyenne is 1 day old.

She is a bigger girl than we expected, 9 pounds and 4 ounces. She feels so heavy, looks so beautiful, already loved so dearly.

But the nurse whisks in this day with a determined look in her eye. Mid-nursing, my daughter Morgan is asked by the nurse to hand over her baby.

They have Cheyenne’s bilirubin numbers. They are dangerously high. She is jaundiced at a disturbing level.

She must go to the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU). Now!

Everything now depends on the light.

The Dangers of Jaundice

Mild infant jaundice isn’t unusual. Almost 60% of newborns are born with jaundice. It causes their skin and eyes to look yellowish. It often disappears on its own within two to three weeks and is harmless.

But occasionally, the build-up of bilirubin in the blood (the normal byproduct of the breakdown of red blood cells) is so high it can cross the thin tissue that separates the brain and blood.

It can damage both the spinal cord and the brain. It can lead to cerebral palsy, hearing loss, learning disabilities, and if left untreated, it can even be fatal.

But what about spiritual jaundice? Is it dangerous too?

When we have a build-up of bad habits, of toxic relationships, of negative attitudes, our spiritual lives also become jaundiced. And not to stretch the metaphor too far, but this build-up can also cross the thin place connecting the brain and the blood.

What can we do about it?

Turn on the Lights!

With my granddaughter Cheyenne, they say she’ll need to stay under the special lights in NICU 24/7, for 3-5 days, until her bilirubin levels come down. Otherwise, she could have brain damage (kernicterus or bilirubin encephalopathy).

She immediately begins phototherapy, or light treatment.

Thank God for the light.

How does phototherapy work?

The special blue-green spectrum of bililights helps make the bilirubin water-soluble, a process called photo-oxidation. With more oxygen in the bilirubin, it’s easier for Cheyenne’s liver to break down the bilirubin and remove it from her blood as she pees and poops. She’s also extra hydrated to speed up the elimination of bilirubin and to protect her from losing too much water through her skin under the lights.

Jeff and I get to peek at Cheyenne in the NICU. We can’t touch her yet.

But we can see her.

She looks so lonely there by herself, wearing the tiniest little sunglasses you ever can imagine, hooked up to an IV, and laying on a bili-blanket of light below with an array of lights all around.

3 Ways Light Can Save You

The healing for our spiritual jaundice also requires extra doses of light. The message the apostle Paul heard from John is God is light (1 John 1: 5).

Here are three ways we can turn on the light for spiritual light therapy, helping clear up our spiritual jaundice.

1. HEAR GOD

Check yourself into the ICU. Intentionally listen for stirrings of God. Maybe you’ll hear him in your favorite music. Or listen for him as you read a favorite psalm about God aloud. Step outside tonight to listen to the insect sounds he created and return outside in the morning to hear the bird songs he orchestrates.

2. SEE GOD

Sit under more light. Look for God in other people. Everyone is made in his image. You’ll find traces of him in every person that crosses your path. See him in your work with others. Reflect on your relationships through the years to remind yourself of all the places God has shown up.

3. TOUCH GOD

Reach for God’s light this week by loving yourself, his creation of wonder. Allow God to love you through small treats (for me, it’s a special dessert or time doing puzzles). Take a walk in the sunshine and feel God’s warmth on your skin.

God’s light is not in short supply. Wrap yourself up in it. Let his light break through your jaundice. 

Touch the Light

Cheyenne is now two days old. It’s Thursday. The grandparents are allowed again into the NICU. This time Lauren, her nurse (God bless her), lets us all the way in.

Jeff and I are grateful to hold our second granddaughter. It’s difficult with the tubes and the light board.

We gingerly wrap our hands around her. We’re thankful to touch her.

The light is saving her life.

She cries. I do, too.

At three days old on Friday, the light treatment (and Cheyenne’s miraculous, God-designed body) is clearing out the bilirubin quicker than expected. She is disconnected from her IV and released from the NICU light therapy.

She returns to a regular hospital room with my daughter, her mom. And she meets her big sister.

After five days in the hospital, Cheyenne is finally released.

Her journey with jaundice still isn’t over (it will take a few more days for it all to clear), but she’s finally well enough to ride home with her mommy and daddy on Saturday.

Grateful for the Light

I’ll always look back to those days almost two years ago with gratitude for the special light that saved my granddaughter.

It reminds me still to be grateful for the special light that saves us all.

We all depend on light for life.

The very Word of life, light himself, existed from the beginning. We have seen his light. We live because of his light.

See the light in your life today. Observe the light. Touch the light.

The light will save you, too.

Share your thoughts in the comments.

This is Week 1 of reading (and for some of us, memorizing) 1 John 1. (It’s not too late to join us.)

John wrote:

“The Word of life existed from the beginning. We have heard it. We have seen it. We observed and touched it.” (1 John 1:1, GW)

Yes. Thank you, God.

How has light saved you in your dark moments? Share in the comments.

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“I’m almost out of light,” he says. He’s sitting on the deck outside.

I want to add, “Me, too.”

Yet I don’t.

I hold it in. I say nothing. We’ve been in silent mode for about an hour already on this Friday night. He may have broken his silence, but I’m not ready to break mine yet.

But I do pull up a chair and sit outside beside him.

He is right. The light is fading. He finally closes his book. Not enough light to read by.

I look at the clouds, some dark, some wispy. All moving, all changing, leaving only pockets of light as the sun goes down in the west.

I shift in my chair and give a little. I speak. I mention I’ll go by the library tomorrow afternoon to return a book. He tells me about a frog he saw as he mowed the grass earlier.

Small talk. But it’s something.

The light continues to fade in the sky. A twinkle appears. I ask if it’s an airplane or a star. He says maybe a satellite.

Little by little, more stars appear. They’ve been there all along. They just couldn’t compete with the sun’s brilliance in the light of day. Now it’s their turn to shine.

He says he didn’t expect it to get dark so quickly.

Yeah, it can sneak up on you.

We don’t mention our heated discussion. We let it lie there, fade with the day.

It may rise up again in a new dawn, sometimes it does. But for now, we just let it go. An unspoken agreement as we stare at the stars and regain perspective of how small our problems are compared to the largeness of the universe.

I say I may go inside now and pop some popcorn. He says he may get a cup of ice cream. We enter the darkness of the house, flip a light switch, and resume our lives. Together, side by side.

Again in the light.

* * *

Relationships can be tricky. Certain issues we need to talk about again and again until they’re resolved. Other issues need to silently fade away and be forgotten. Wisdom means knowing which one is which.

As we get ready to touch our relationships with God and with other people in our Touch the Light 1 John 1 challenge, let’s notice God sending us sparks of light in whatever situation we’re in. Even on dark nights after the sun has set, the stars show up, one at a time, enough to see by until morning breaks again.

Share your thoughts in the comments.

Which relationships are hardest for you? Share in the comments.

I’m linking at these blog parties

If you’re interested in joining our 1 John 1 challenge to read or memorize or study ten verses, get details here and sign up today.

The Chaos Friend

I’m sitting in a folding chair in a big room. The speakers for the next Women’s Conference are being announced.

Through the long list of names, I only hear one name I recognize.

It is the one I would have least expected.

It is my chaos friend.

Her life, a series of hard circumstances and scarcity, began with learning disabilities as a child. Had she been in a different family at a different time, the disabilities might have been addressed. The poverty might not have been inevitable.

But instead, she bears the false stigma of “slowness,” a coinciding speech impediment, and a lifetime (so far) of lack. She’s had many ups and downs, actually more downs than ups, if you’re counting.

And they are inviting her to speak?

Do Not Gloat

I wake up. It was all a dream. The sunlight is streaming through my window.

But even in the light of day, even now weeks later, the dream sticks with me.

And the shock is wearing off.

I’ve known this friend for a few years. I’ve seen her get in some sticky jams. (I’ve even judged her for a few of them. Sigh. Shame on me.)

But I’ve also seen her bounce back time and again.

She lives rough, but she keeps moving forward. She endures hard breaks, but she keeps smiling. She leaves trails of mistakes, but she remains hopeful.

And I see it now.

Why, yes, she would make an excellent women’s conference speaker!

Despite her choices causing me frustration at times, she is a light in my life. She is another angle of God for me. She has as much of the divine in her as everyone else. She loves me. And I love her.

She walks in God’s light as far as her feet will carry her.

She exemplifies this truth:

“Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light.”
Micah 7:8

Search for Light

As I prepare to spend time with God in 1 John 1 for 6 weeks this fall (“God is light” and “Walk in the light” and “He is faithful“), I hope to remember my friend with light, even in the midst of her often reckless lifestyle.

Perhaps what was only a nighttime dream in my sleep could become a reality for her in our wakefulness.

What we dream in the dark can come to life in the light.

Sometimes it’s hard to see the light. But the light is always here.

God is always shining. Even when our vision gets too cloudy to notice his brightness.

I want to see the light in dark spaces. I want to notice more light in already bright spaces.

• Search for the light.
• Greet the light.
• Touch the light.

The 1 John 1 “Touch the Light” challenge resources are available beginning today. . You’ll also receive one email per week during the challenge with additional resources for 6 weeks, beginning September 12. Whether you want to read, memorize, meditate, or study his light this fall, you’ll discover a brighter world in the presence of God.

Do you have a chaos friend that shows you God, too? Thank God for them today. Share in the comments.

I’m linking up at these blog parties

UPDATE: The Fall 2021 challenge has now ended. But I still encourage to memorize this chapter using any of the free resources provided.

* * *

This fall let’s take an online walk together with Jesus, the Living Word, through 1 John 1.

“The Word of life existed from the beginning. We have heard it. We have seen it. We observed and touched it.”
1 John 1:1 (GW Translation)

For 6 weeks I’ll be posting on the blog and sending out resources via email to those who sign up for ways we can “touch the Light” of Jesus.

You choose your preferred approach to the text. You’ll receive resources to personalize your challenge. Mix and match any of the following:

• Read the ten verses in a different translation each week
• Memorize all ten verses over six weeks (join our private scripture memory Facebook group, Hide His Word)
• Meditate on the truths verse by verse
• Study the chapter and related verses in context

Whatever your goal, we’ll be here for each other in community, providing encouragement, resources, and support in our encounters with Jesus. 

We’ll officially begin after Labor Day, but let’s begin preparing our hearts now.

.

Share your thoughts in the comments.

Have you participated in online studies in the past? What did you like the most about them? Share in the comments.